1
00:00:44,080 --> 00:00:49,300
Young love, take this bus, take this
bus, hop a ride.

2
00:00:50,240 --> 00:00:55,660
Ringing you every day, begging for a
word of praise.

3
00:00:56,080 --> 00:01:01,840
I put aside my foolish games, I run and
hide and call a name.

4
00:01:02,820 --> 00:01:04,980
School's out, bells will ring.

5
00:01:05,700 --> 00:01:08,460
Time for time to teach me everything.

6
00:01:09,040 --> 00:01:11,480
Did you teach, did you teach me love?

7
00:01:12,250 --> 00:01:14,430
I can't learn fast enough.

8
00:01:15,090 --> 00:01:17,610
Teach me, teach me more.

9
00:01:18,050 --> 00:01:20,930
I've got to learn to love on the floor.

10
00:01:21,430 --> 00:01:23,450
Lesson one, just begun.

11
00:01:24,210 --> 00:01:26,670
We're rolling up, ain't much fun.

12
00:01:27,630 --> 00:01:29,790
Rolling up, out of school.

13
00:01:30,590 --> 00:01:32,910
Out of love, out of rules.

14
00:01:33,690 --> 00:01:35,890
No one there, tell me how.

15
00:01:36,890 --> 00:01:40,030
My girl, teach, teach me now.

16
00:02:00,240 --> 00:02:02,920
All right, folks, can we all come down
for a second?

17
00:02:03,500 --> 00:02:04,920
I know that you, uh...

18
00:02:05,290 --> 00:02:10,090
You settle down. No, I want everybody to
settle down. Sandy, come on. Now, none

19
00:02:10,090 --> 00:02:14,070
of that is not a time to make silly
jokes. It's a time for a little bit of

20
00:02:14,070 --> 00:02:16,010
talking before we really get to the
important part.

21
00:02:16,250 --> 00:02:18,970
Here we go. Well, it's been another
great year here at Jams.

22
00:02:19,330 --> 00:02:22,730
Who can forget Mr. Pincus' haunted
classroom? Thank you, Sandy, for that.

23
00:02:22,950 --> 00:02:24,570
Yeah, I ain't afraid of no ghost.

24
00:02:26,410 --> 00:02:30,190
Or the wild success of the book drive
for the women's prison, which Ms.

25
00:02:30,410 --> 00:02:31,550
Pavacek's class sponsored.

26
00:02:31,790 --> 00:02:33,410
Thank you, Beth.

27
00:02:34,110 --> 00:02:37,880
But as summer... draws upon us, it's
time not only to say goodbye to another

28
00:02:37,880 --> 00:02:41,880
school year, but sadly also to say
goodbye to one of our faculty members.

29
00:02:42,160 --> 00:02:43,420
Yeah. Elizabeth?

30
00:02:44,300 --> 00:02:46,220
Is Elizabeth Halsey here? There she is.

31
00:02:46,680 --> 00:02:47,940
Elizabeth, can you come on up here?

32
00:02:48,800 --> 00:02:50,920
Yes, that's appropriate. Applause, I
think.

33
00:02:52,560 --> 00:02:58,560
Elizabeth, even though you were only
with us for one short year, please know

34
00:02:58,560 --> 00:03:01,660
that we will always consider you part of
the Jams family.

35
00:03:01,860 --> 00:03:03,260
And we got you a little something.

36
00:03:04,220 --> 00:03:06,740
Ta -da. Oh, thank you.

37
00:03:07,080 --> 00:03:08,080
Wow.

38
00:03:09,040 --> 00:03:10,120
Almost $40.

39
00:03:11,140 --> 00:03:12,140
Thank you.

40
00:03:12,160 --> 00:03:13,380
You're very welcome. Speech.

41
00:03:13,720 --> 00:03:18,040
Okay, well, I'm really terrible at these
types of things, so I'll make it quick.

42
00:03:18,880 --> 00:03:22,460
I know I've only been here a year, but
there's so much I will miss.

43
00:03:22,900 --> 00:03:24,620
My students probably most.

44
00:03:30,580 --> 00:03:33,400
And I wish that I had got to know all of
you better.

45
00:03:40,040 --> 00:03:43,480
but between board classes and planning a
wedding, my plate was full.

46
00:03:43,940 --> 00:03:46,340
Still, I know our students are in good
hands.

47
00:03:48,420 --> 00:03:53,380
And even though I'll never teach again
professionally, I've realized that I

48
00:03:53,380 --> 00:03:57,400
don't need a blackboard or a classroom
to set an example.

49
00:04:33,550 --> 00:04:37,430
because I'm going to suck your dick like
I'm mad at it. Oh, look.

50
00:04:37,870 --> 00:04:39,590
Your mom's here. Hi, Mom.

51
00:04:39,930 --> 00:04:40,950
What a fun surprise.

52
00:04:42,370 --> 00:04:44,130
Suitcases. Honey, are we going on a
trip?

53
00:04:44,670 --> 00:04:46,710
Elizabeth, we need to talk.

54
00:04:47,130 --> 00:04:51,010
Sure. I'm starting to think that maybe
we need to take a break.

55
00:04:51,310 --> 00:04:54,570
Forever. Mom? Tell her what the
accountant said. Mom!

56
00:04:55,530 --> 00:04:59,390
Stephen said that you spent $16 ,000
last month.

57
00:04:59,830 --> 00:05:01,130
He thinks you're bad news.

58
00:05:01,490 --> 00:05:02,489
I know.

59
00:05:02,490 --> 00:05:06,550
women like you. Damn it, Mom. I told you
I could handle this. I just want to ask

60
00:05:06,550 --> 00:05:09,350
her something. You truly love my son?

61
00:05:09,810 --> 00:05:11,810
I love him so much it hurts.

62
00:05:12,630 --> 00:05:13,630
All right, then.

63
00:05:14,150 --> 00:05:15,570
When is his birthday?

64
00:05:15,810 --> 00:05:16,810
Mom.

65
00:05:17,610 --> 00:05:21,910
I'm not... You know, that is just
offensive that you would even ask me

66
00:05:22,210 --> 00:05:23,210
It's today.

67
00:05:25,230 --> 00:05:26,230
I know.

68
00:05:29,130 --> 00:05:30,790
That's why I got you this.

69
00:05:32,680 --> 00:05:33,680
Happy birthday.

70
00:05:34,160 --> 00:05:35,160
Austin Market?

71
00:05:35,360 --> 00:05:36,360
Okay, fine.

72
00:05:36,620 --> 00:05:37,740
I'll sign the prenup.

73
00:05:38,740 --> 00:05:40,040
It's over, Elizabeth.

74
00:05:41,120 --> 00:05:42,120
Mark, I'm pregnant.

75
00:05:43,000 --> 00:05:44,000
Bullshit.

76
00:05:44,360 --> 00:05:46,040
Okay, fine. I'm not actually pregnant.

77
00:05:46,480 --> 00:05:50,380
You know what? I'm starting to wonder
whether this has always been about the

78
00:05:50,380 --> 00:05:55,140
money. You never loved me. I don't love
you? I have been listening to you whine

79
00:05:55,140 --> 00:05:56,720
about opera for the last year.

80
00:05:56,940 --> 00:06:01,040
Okay. If the younger generation doesn't
get into opera, then guess what?

81
00:06:01,440 --> 00:06:08,380
no more opera an art form has died if
opera goes away we're fucked i want my

82
00:06:08,380 --> 00:06:11,560
ring back what am i supposed to do huh
where am i supposed to go

83
00:06:45,840 --> 00:06:46,840
There she is!

84
00:06:47,420 --> 00:06:48,880
Elizabeth Halsey!

85
00:06:49,800 --> 00:06:56,800
I am so excited we're going to be across
the hall, mate, but I am so sad it's

86
00:06:56,800 --> 00:06:58,200
because your relationship ended.

87
00:06:58,540 --> 00:06:59,620
Who are you again?

88
00:07:00,000 --> 00:07:01,000
Amy Squirrel.

89
00:07:02,180 --> 00:07:04,280
Squirrel? Yeah, you know.

90
00:07:06,960 --> 00:07:12,700
Don't worry, you were kind of a lone
wolf last year and so busy planning the

91
00:07:12,700 --> 00:07:13,700
wedding.

92
00:07:14,110 --> 00:07:15,550
I found him in bed with somebody else.

93
00:07:15,830 --> 00:07:17,010
Oh, my gosh.

94
00:07:17,290 --> 00:07:17,989
It was another man.

95
00:07:17,990 --> 00:07:19,370
Shut the front door.

96
00:07:21,130 --> 00:07:26,930
Look, I know you kind of skated by last
year doing the bare minimum thing, but I

97
00:07:26,930 --> 00:07:32,110
just want to say, now you're back, I
just know you are going to get your

98
00:07:32,110 --> 00:07:33,110
teaching on.

99
00:07:34,490 --> 00:07:39,270
I thought the teachers were supposed to
get the apples.

100
00:07:40,010 --> 00:07:43,850
Well, I think the students teach me at
least as much as I teach them.

101
00:07:45,350 --> 00:07:46,910
That's just something I say sometimes.

102
00:07:47,470 --> 00:07:48,470
Stupid.

103
00:08:03,390 --> 00:08:08,010
Sorry. I just wanted to know if you
wanted to grab some lunch.

104
00:08:08,760 --> 00:08:10,240
I'm kind of in the middle of something,
Lynn.

105
00:08:10,460 --> 00:08:11,460
My treat.

106
00:08:13,060 --> 00:08:16,860
You know, Lynn, when I first started
teaching, I thought that I was doing it

107
00:08:16,860 --> 00:08:17,860
all the right reasons.

108
00:08:18,280 --> 00:08:20,360
Shorter hours, summer's off, no
accountability.

109
00:08:20,880 --> 00:08:23,160
Oh, I love my summers. Fresh corn.

110
00:08:24,060 --> 00:08:28,380
From now on, my full -time job is
finding a guy who's going to take care

111
00:08:28,700 --> 00:08:29,700
God, I pray for that.

112
00:08:30,180 --> 00:08:33,179
You know, I spent my entire summer
hanging out at bars near where the Bulls

113
00:08:33,179 --> 00:08:34,179
practice.

114
00:08:34,570 --> 00:08:38,130
I had some fun, got some cool souvenirs,
but those guys are not looking to

115
00:08:38,130 --> 00:08:42,110
settle down. I mean, they all wear
condoms. Then they take the condoms with

116
00:08:42,110 --> 00:08:45,610
them. That's how paranoid they are. Like
it's so easy to get pregnant from some

117
00:08:45,610 --> 00:08:47,130
dude nutting into a condom.

118
00:08:47,490 --> 00:08:48,570
Yeah. Yeah.

119
00:08:50,110 --> 00:08:52,230
You're going to find someone great.
Yeah.

120
00:08:52,770 --> 00:08:54,150
I've been thinking about it a lot.

121
00:08:54,490 --> 00:08:56,150
I'm like an eight, eight and a half.

122
00:08:56,750 --> 00:08:59,330
But if I got a new pair of tits, right?

123
00:09:00,220 --> 00:09:02,360
Don't want to do that. You're already so
pretty.

124
00:09:02,580 --> 00:09:07,480
You have no idea how difficult it is to
compete against these Barbie doll types.

125
00:09:07,880 --> 00:09:08,960
Yeah, that's true.

126
00:09:10,040 --> 00:09:11,640
We're not getting any younger.

127
00:09:12,020 --> 00:09:14,460
Yeah. Ooh, we should finish up.

128
00:09:15,680 --> 00:09:18,900
Wally's got that big orientation in the
auditorium.

129
00:09:19,100 --> 00:09:20,140
Yeah, I'm not going to go to that.

130
00:09:20,360 --> 00:09:21,360
But it's mandatory.

131
00:09:22,720 --> 00:09:23,720
Ooh.

132
00:09:24,360 --> 00:09:27,800
I probably won't go either.

133
00:09:29,360 --> 00:09:30,360
I don't know, I might.

134
00:09:30,480 --> 00:09:33,800
I'll probably go and just sit in the
back. Maybe leave early.

135
00:09:34,520 --> 00:09:39,460
Maybe day to the end. I'll play it by
ear. Or just day to the end.

136
00:09:39,860 --> 00:09:41,500
Oh, I don't know.

137
00:09:43,180 --> 00:09:45,440
Okay, well, this was fun, huh?

138
00:09:49,060 --> 00:09:52,040
Welcome to Air 7th Grade Social Studies.

139
00:09:52,460 --> 00:09:56,740
I'll be your captain, Miss Squirrel.
Current altitude for the year will be

140
00:09:56,740 --> 00:09:58,560
geography through current events.

141
00:09:59,210 --> 00:10:03,490
They have a layover in civics, so buckle
up, because it's going to be a crazy

142
00:10:03,490 --> 00:10:04,490
ride.

143
00:10:06,410 --> 00:10:09,110
The photographer was, like, so nice.

144
00:10:09,430 --> 00:10:11,750
He made me feel, like, really, really
comfortable.

145
00:10:12,350 --> 00:10:14,730
I might get flown to Kansas City for
their fashion week.

146
00:10:15,270 --> 00:10:16,290
Kansas City?

147
00:10:17,810 --> 00:10:18,810
Talk much?

148
00:10:21,070 --> 00:10:22,070
Loser!

149
00:10:42,920 --> 00:10:43,920
I'm Sasha Abernathy.

150
00:10:44,160 --> 00:10:45,920
Did my mother bake these cookies for
you?

151
00:10:46,280 --> 00:10:47,700
Just leave them on the desk.

152
00:10:52,760 --> 00:10:53,760
You need something?

153
00:10:57,700 --> 00:11:00,300
Anyone seen Stand and Deliver? Show of
hands.

154
00:11:01,840 --> 00:11:02,840
Are you kidding me?

155
00:11:04,120 --> 00:11:05,180
Edward James Olmos?

156
00:11:07,340 --> 00:11:08,380
Lou Diamond Phillips?

157
00:11:10,500 --> 00:11:12,060
Wow. All right.

158
00:11:12,280 --> 00:11:14,000
You and you.

159
00:11:14,420 --> 00:11:15,880
Grab the TV and roll it up front.

160
00:11:16,160 --> 00:11:19,020
We're watching a movie on the first day?
I think it's awesome.

161
00:11:19,400 --> 00:11:20,400
You rock.

162
00:11:21,880 --> 00:11:22,880
Oh.

163
00:11:25,700 --> 00:11:26,700
Because you suck.

164
00:11:50,839 --> 00:11:51,839
Elizabeth.

165
00:11:53,120 --> 00:11:54,120
Hey, Russell.

166
00:11:55,520 --> 00:11:57,060
Russell Geddes, gym teacher.

167
00:11:57,320 --> 00:11:59,260
We did bus duty together last spring.

168
00:11:59,720 --> 00:12:02,180
Yeah. So I heard about the whole
engagement thing.

169
00:12:02,840 --> 00:12:03,840
That blows.

170
00:12:03,900 --> 00:12:05,820
Did you know I walked in on him trying
to fuck his dog?

171
00:12:06,800 --> 00:12:07,800
Peanut butter everywhere.

172
00:12:08,640 --> 00:12:09,640
That's gross.

173
00:12:10,160 --> 00:12:15,380
Anyway, hey, uh, might be too soon, but
you wanna, like, grab a bite or

174
00:12:15,380 --> 00:12:16,380
something sometime?

175
00:12:16,420 --> 00:12:17,540
You still a gym teacher?

176
00:12:17,820 --> 00:12:18,779
I am, yeah.

177
00:12:18,780 --> 00:12:19,780
Then no.

178
00:12:20,970 --> 00:12:22,330
I don't date co -workers.

179
00:12:22,910 --> 00:12:23,910
I won't tell anyone.

180
00:12:24,410 --> 00:12:25,410
I hope they said no.

181
00:12:26,150 --> 00:12:27,069
Okay, cool.

182
00:12:27,070 --> 00:12:28,070
Well, this has been awesome.

183
00:12:31,650 --> 00:12:33,150
Somebody's got a case of the sleepies.

184
00:12:34,230 --> 00:12:36,210
What? Did you see the coleslaw
altercation?

185
00:12:37,510 --> 00:12:40,930
Yeah. That one kid hit the other kid
with some coleslaw.

186
00:12:41,970 --> 00:12:44,490
You weren't at the orientation the other
day. Okay.

187
00:12:45,150 --> 00:12:48,390
Boy, Elizabeth, you missed a boatload of
stuff.

188
00:12:49,130 --> 00:12:54,190
Anyways, the orientation, I suggested a
new system for supervising lunch.

189
00:12:54,650 --> 00:12:55,970
It's a quadrant system.

190
00:12:56,370 --> 00:12:59,850
I tell you what, why don't you just send
me a memo, and if I have any questions,

191
00:12:59,970 --> 00:13:00,970
I'll find you.

192
00:13:01,670 --> 00:13:04,430
Oh, oh, yeah, I meant to ask.

193
00:13:04,770 --> 00:13:09,170
Did I hear you were showing a movie this
morning on the first day of school?

194
00:13:09,910 --> 00:13:11,170
How do I know what you heard?

195
00:13:11,590 --> 00:13:16,070
Listen, I don't want to tell you how to
run your class, but maybe it might be

196
00:13:16,070 --> 00:13:17,490
fun to try some icebreakers.

197
00:13:18,270 --> 00:13:20,610
Like telephone charades or the string
game.

198
00:13:23,870 --> 00:13:25,610
Are we going to have a problem, me and
you?

199
00:13:27,230 --> 00:13:28,230
No.

200
00:13:28,710 --> 00:13:34,570
If I gave you that impression, well, I'm
so sorry. Because

201
00:13:34,570 --> 00:13:38,770
actually, I was really hoping we could
be more than just across the hall, mate.

202
00:13:39,590 --> 00:13:42,410
I don't know what you heard, but I don't
eat muff pie.

203
00:13:43,370 --> 00:13:45,490
No, of course not. I don't even know.

204
00:13:46,860 --> 00:13:49,460
What that is, I just meant friend.

205
00:13:50,180 --> 00:13:52,180
Tell you what, friend, I've got to get
going.

206
00:13:52,400 --> 00:13:53,400
Cover me.

207
00:13:55,700 --> 00:13:58,000
Elizabeth, lunch isn't in for another
seven minutes.

208
00:13:58,380 --> 00:13:59,700
Who's going to watch your quadrant?

209
00:14:07,820 --> 00:14:09,940
Hi there.

210
00:14:10,300 --> 00:14:12,480
You look like Lofty McLosterson.

211
00:14:12,700 --> 00:14:15,800
I know, right? Can you tell me what room
107 is?

212
00:14:16,220 --> 00:14:17,880
I'll do you one better. I'll take you
there.

213
00:14:18,180 --> 00:14:21,460
Oh, you don't have to do that. Oh, stop
it. Be my pleasure.

214
00:14:21,900 --> 00:14:23,540
Scott Delacorte. Elizabeth Halsey.

215
00:14:23,880 --> 00:14:24,880
I'm the new sub.

216
00:14:25,300 --> 00:14:26,300
Welcome, welcome.

217
00:14:26,500 --> 00:14:27,500
Thank you.

218
00:14:27,540 --> 00:14:28,920
Is that a Jaeger LeCoultre?

219
00:14:29,380 --> 00:14:30,380
Good eye.

220
00:14:30,700 --> 00:14:34,500
Thanks. I love men's watches. It's kind
of a hobby. You know, sometimes I get

221
00:14:34,500 --> 00:14:38,500
self -conscious about it, but my
grandfather made it, so... Oh, your

222
00:14:38,500 --> 00:14:39,500
designs watches?

223
00:14:39,620 --> 00:14:40,620
The family business.

224
00:14:40,800 --> 00:14:42,520
Yeah, my mother's maiden name is
LeCoultre.

225
00:14:44,220 --> 00:14:45,220
Shut up.

226
00:14:46,079 --> 00:14:48,160
So, did you and your wife just move to
town?

227
00:14:48,400 --> 00:14:49,379
I'm not married.

228
00:14:49,380 --> 00:14:51,400
I actually just got out of a
relationship.

229
00:14:52,240 --> 00:14:53,240
Catherine.

230
00:14:54,460 --> 00:14:56,960
It's been a year. She stole the
wallpaper on my phone.

231
00:14:57,580 --> 00:14:58,900
She has such a big heart.

232
00:15:00,100 --> 00:15:02,040
Looks like enormous.

233
00:15:06,140 --> 00:15:10,700
As you can see, the weight is evenly
distributed, and there's minimal

234
00:15:10,980 --> 00:15:12,900
Dr. Vogel, best hands in Chicago.

235
00:15:14,600 --> 00:15:16,880
May I? Absolutely. Take them for a spin.

236
00:15:19,500 --> 00:15:20,500
God.

237
00:15:21,900 --> 00:15:22,900
Wow.

238
00:15:23,120 --> 00:15:24,600
Yeah. These are amazing.

239
00:15:25,280 --> 00:15:26,280
Thank you.

240
00:15:26,320 --> 00:15:27,540
And the nipples.

241
00:15:27,960 --> 00:15:28,960
I know.

242
00:15:29,580 --> 00:15:30,580
I'll take two.

243
00:15:33,140 --> 00:15:40,120
The total is $9 ,300 for the surgery
plus one night

244
00:15:40,120 --> 00:15:41,120
stay at our facility.

245
00:15:41,460 --> 00:15:42,680
How would you like to pay?

246
00:15:42,900 --> 00:15:43,900
That's absurd.

247
00:15:44,190 --> 00:15:46,230
I'm a teacher, not a drug dealer.

248
00:15:46,490 --> 00:15:48,470
We accept all major credit cards.

249
00:15:48,710 --> 00:15:52,750
Yeah, well, my credit situation is a
little complicated.

250
00:15:53,370 --> 00:15:56,370
I'm sorry, but if you can't pay, then I
can't schedule the appointment.

251
00:15:58,550 --> 00:15:59,550
I'll be back.

252
00:16:00,590 --> 00:16:03,290
I'm rooming with a guy I met on
Craigslist.

253
00:16:03,490 --> 00:16:05,330
All I'm asking you for is $10 ,000.

254
00:16:06,410 --> 00:16:08,710
You owe me for breaking off the
engagement.

255
00:16:09,310 --> 00:16:11,010
You know how humiliating that was?

256
00:16:14,329 --> 00:16:16,410
Lover, lover, look, I don't want to
fight.

257
00:16:16,830 --> 00:16:19,550
It's only $10 ,000 that would mean the
world to me.

258
00:16:20,430 --> 00:16:21,430
Lover?

259
00:16:22,530 --> 00:16:23,530
Are you there?

260
00:16:25,650 --> 00:16:26,650
Fucking troll!

261
00:16:27,010 --> 00:16:28,250
Did you call my name?

262
00:16:28,530 --> 00:16:30,670
No, I said fucking troll.

263
00:16:30,990 --> 00:16:32,770
Oh, I thought you said Kirk.

264
00:16:34,890 --> 00:16:35,890
Do you have 10 grand?

265
00:16:37,270 --> 00:16:38,270
Nope.

266
00:16:38,750 --> 00:16:41,990
And also, I might be a little short on
rent this month.

267
00:16:42,650 --> 00:16:43,650
Like a lot short.

268
00:16:44,430 --> 00:16:45,430
This might help.

269
00:16:47,950 --> 00:16:48,950
Want to get wasted?

270
00:16:49,170 --> 00:16:50,650
Uh, yeah.

271
00:16:51,030 --> 00:16:52,470
Cool. See ya.

272
00:16:54,970 --> 00:16:58,410
We are in a state of emergency, and my
word is law.

273
00:16:58,830 --> 00:17:01,130
There's only one boss in this place, and
that's me.

274
00:17:02,490 --> 00:17:03,730
The HNIC.

275
00:17:05,869 --> 00:17:06,869
All right.

276
00:17:06,990 --> 00:17:08,470
We'll pick this up again tomorrow.

277
00:17:12,079 --> 00:17:13,079
Can I help you?

278
00:17:17,520 --> 00:17:18,520
What?

279
00:17:25,700 --> 00:17:27,599
I'm the student leader for the trip to
Springfield.

280
00:17:28,260 --> 00:17:30,340
Shocker. We're having our car wash this
weekend.

281
00:17:30,540 --> 00:17:32,240
If you're around, maybe we could wash
your car.

282
00:17:32,540 --> 00:17:34,720
The Springfield trip is the best part of
seventh grade.

283
00:17:34,940 --> 00:17:36,860
Last year's car wash raised $6 ,000.

284
00:17:38,620 --> 00:17:39,620
Whoa!

285
00:17:40,600 --> 00:17:43,480
Bringing these magazines to school is
not the way you're going to make

286
00:17:43,560 --> 00:17:45,460
Arkady. Those eighth grade boys are just
using you.

287
00:17:45,860 --> 00:17:47,520
So, I'm going now?

288
00:17:47,820 --> 00:17:52,320
Yes, you go now. But if I see these
again, I'm going to call your parents.

289
00:17:52,320 --> 00:17:53,320
you understand?

290
00:17:55,000 --> 00:17:56,000
Go to class.

291
00:17:57,860 --> 00:17:58,860
Hey, hey.

292
00:17:58,940 --> 00:17:59,940
Hey.

293
00:18:00,880 --> 00:18:02,180
Go to class.

294
00:18:06,460 --> 00:18:08,260
Another exciting day in the principal's
office.

295
00:18:09,290 --> 00:18:10,290
Do you have a second?

296
00:18:10,570 --> 00:18:14,150
Uh, yeah. Oh, you know what? I wanted to
talk to you, too. Did I hear that

297
00:18:14,150 --> 00:18:16,330
right, that you were showing movies all
last week?

298
00:18:16,670 --> 00:18:18,490
Hmm. Some clips, maybe.

299
00:18:19,130 --> 00:18:22,970
But, you know, in a lot of ways, I think
that movies are the new books.

300
00:18:24,130 --> 00:18:25,130
Uh -huh.

301
00:18:33,070 --> 00:18:34,070
Is this new?

302
00:18:35,190 --> 00:18:36,770
I love it!

303
00:18:37,270 --> 00:18:38,930
You know, I've always said that...

304
00:18:39,150 --> 00:18:40,730
Dolphins are the humans of the sea.

305
00:18:41,450 --> 00:18:43,510
I have a bumper sticker that says that.

306
00:18:43,930 --> 00:18:44,930
No way.

307
00:18:45,030 --> 00:18:46,030
I'm not kidding.

308
00:18:46,870 --> 00:18:47,870
It's on my car.

309
00:18:49,290 --> 00:18:50,290
Come on.

310
00:18:51,670 --> 00:18:52,670
Hold on a sec.

311
00:18:59,970 --> 00:19:01,470
His name is Simon.

312
00:19:01,970 --> 00:19:05,070
And he lives in the Cayman Islands.

313
00:19:05,990 --> 00:19:06,990
With his brother.

314
00:19:11,150 --> 00:19:12,150
What a great story.

315
00:19:13,650 --> 00:19:14,870
What did you want to talk about?

316
00:19:15,290 --> 00:19:17,410
I was thinking that I want to get more
involved.

317
00:19:17,690 --> 00:19:22,710
You know, I don't know, something like
maybe supervising the seventh grade car

318
00:19:22,710 --> 00:19:23,710
wash.

319
00:19:24,250 --> 00:19:27,030
You know, Amy has been running that for
like two years.

320
00:19:27,430 --> 00:19:28,670
Yeah, but she does so much already.

321
00:19:28,950 --> 00:19:30,410
It might be nice to give her a little
rest.

322
00:19:32,330 --> 00:19:36,170
It's so nice to see you becoming a real
member of the Jams family.

323
00:19:37,470 --> 00:19:38,990
It just feels so good to help.

324
00:19:59,730 --> 00:20:00,730
Let's do this.

325
00:20:59,340 --> 00:21:00,340
Hey.

326
00:21:00,480 --> 00:21:01,480
Hey.

327
00:21:01,600 --> 00:21:04,320
Hey, you better not take it for a
joyride. Are you sure? I'm watching you.

328
00:21:05,320 --> 00:21:06,820
It's a holiday. Hey. I'm impressed.

329
00:21:07,520 --> 00:21:08,980
Thanks. I've been working out. What a
turnout.

330
00:21:10,320 --> 00:21:12,420
Oh, yeah, and the kids are just having a
blast.

331
00:21:12,800 --> 00:21:14,060
Well, that's what it's all about.

332
00:21:14,480 --> 00:21:16,780
God, you know, we should go get a drink
tonight. I feel like getting drunk.

333
00:21:18,400 --> 00:21:19,820
I mean, not drunk drunk.

334
00:21:20,260 --> 00:21:21,260
Strong buzz.

335
00:21:21,540 --> 00:21:22,540
Still be able to drive.

336
00:21:23,020 --> 00:21:24,020
I'm sorry.

337
00:21:24,540 --> 00:21:26,160
I can't yet. I'm just not ready.

338
00:21:26,520 --> 00:21:27,620
But you're patient.

339
00:21:28,300 --> 00:21:29,620
I think I might be worth your while.

340
00:21:30,040 --> 00:21:31,040
You're worth the wait.

341
00:21:32,100 --> 00:21:33,100
I think so, too.

342
00:22:00,260 --> 00:22:02,780
Amy? What are you doing? Get out of
here!

343
00:22:03,140 --> 00:22:04,460
This will just take a sec.

344
00:22:04,880 --> 00:22:09,260
Um, I happen to be peddling past the
seventh grade car wash this Saturday.

345
00:22:09,560 --> 00:22:10,940
Can we talk about this later?

346
00:22:11,440 --> 00:22:14,020
Later we'll all die, said the gator to
the fly.

347
00:22:15,300 --> 00:22:16,300
What?

348
00:22:17,760 --> 00:22:18,760
Let's go.

349
00:22:21,140 --> 00:22:25,180
Now, I don't want to speak out of
school, but from where I was sitting...

350
00:22:30,280 --> 00:22:32,340
Halsey was getting pretty chummy with
the money.

351
00:22:32,920 --> 00:22:38,500
Are you accusing Elizabeth of embezzling
from the seventh grade car wash?

352
00:22:39,240 --> 00:22:42,840
Wally, we barely know anything about
her.

353
00:22:43,180 --> 00:22:45,020
Hey, you know what? They raised almost
$7 ,000.

354
00:22:45,440 --> 00:22:46,760
So whatever she did worked.

355
00:22:47,280 --> 00:22:50,680
Via June's dad called. He said the car
wash was a raging success.

356
00:22:50,960 --> 00:22:53,860
And Lauren Ritzman's dad called. He said
we should have a car wash every

357
00:22:53,860 --> 00:22:57,660
weekend. Oh. So instead of accusing her,
you might want to ask her for some

358
00:22:57,660 --> 00:23:01,530
pointers. Well, if those pointers...
Joiners include wearing provocative

359
00:23:01,530 --> 00:23:03,170
beachwear for money.

360
00:23:03,770 --> 00:23:04,770
I think I'll pass.

361
00:23:04,910 --> 00:23:08,830
This is ridiculous. This is the one
place in this building where I'm allowed

362
00:23:08,830 --> 00:23:09,830
be alone with my thoughts.

363
00:23:10,110 --> 00:23:11,810
I only have this once a day.

364
00:23:12,390 --> 00:23:17,230
If I'm lucky, next time you accuse one
of my teachers of stealing, you better

365
00:23:17,230 --> 00:23:18,230
have some evidence.

366
00:23:18,430 --> 00:23:19,510
God damn it!

367
00:23:19,730 --> 00:23:20,730
We are done here.

368
00:23:35,400 --> 00:23:36,640
I thought she was never going to leave.

369
00:23:43,480 --> 00:23:49,360
She's such a phony. A major phony.

370
00:23:49,600 --> 00:23:52,140
Yeah, but she also cares a lot, too.

371
00:23:56,340 --> 00:23:58,880
I love how his eyes sparkle when he
smiles.

372
00:23:59,320 --> 00:24:00,580
I want to sit on his face.

373
00:24:00,960 --> 00:24:02,180
Hey, guys. Hey.

374
00:24:03,740 --> 00:24:07,000
Lynn, will you go grab me some milk?
What kind of milk do you want?

375
00:24:07,600 --> 00:24:10,120
Skim, whole, 2%, chocolate?

376
00:24:10,880 --> 00:24:11,759
Surprise me.

377
00:24:11,760 --> 00:24:17,420
Okay, I'll get you some. No, 2%. Hello.

378
00:24:18,540 --> 00:24:20,260
Hola, fellow educators.

379
00:24:22,240 --> 00:24:27,500
Is everything okay with Gabby? She'll be
fine. I told her, Gabby, if you're not

380
00:24:27,500 --> 00:24:30,580
happy with yourself, you can't expect
others to be happy with you.

381
00:24:30,820 --> 00:24:32,540
It starts with you.

382
00:24:32,990 --> 00:24:34,510
I'm sure she appreciated that. Yeah.

383
00:24:35,890 --> 00:24:39,550
And it's exactly what I told Elizabeth
when she told me about this upcoming

384
00:24:39,550 --> 00:24:40,550
breast job.

385
00:24:40,810 --> 00:24:41,810
Oh.

386
00:24:43,830 --> 00:24:44,830
Sorry.

387
00:24:45,230 --> 00:24:46,930
Sorry. I thought you were telling
everyone.

388
00:24:47,250 --> 00:24:48,250
Did you?

389
00:24:48,310 --> 00:24:51,930
Well, I'm pro -choice. I believe
everyone should choose whatever makes

390
00:24:51,930 --> 00:24:54,270
happiest. Except abortion, of course.

391
00:24:54,530 --> 00:24:55,469
Of course.

392
00:24:55,470 --> 00:24:58,270
It looks like algebra is calling.

393
00:24:58,530 --> 00:24:59,590
I hate math.

394
00:24:59,830 --> 00:25:00,830
Wish me luck.

395
00:25:00,890 --> 00:25:04,320
Hi. I'm a math terrorist with close ties
to algebra.

396
00:25:05,000 --> 00:25:07,500
I have weapons of math instruction.

397
00:25:15,420 --> 00:25:16,420
You're all welcome.

398
00:25:16,560 --> 00:25:19,460
Man, everyone is so nice around here.
Oh, of course.

399
00:25:19,660 --> 00:25:21,100
Hey, watch my quadrant.

400
00:25:22,060 --> 00:25:24,120
Here you go, 1%. Surprise.

401
00:25:25,260 --> 00:25:27,640
Hi, my name is Elizabeth Halsey.

402
00:25:28,520 --> 00:25:29,520
Any questions?

403
00:25:31,179 --> 00:25:32,620
Hi, I'm Sasha's mother.

404
00:25:33,020 --> 00:25:36,680
I'm a little concerned at the importance
you're placing on movies.

405
00:25:37,100 --> 00:25:39,960
I was just wondering what your plans
were for the state test.

406
00:25:40,640 --> 00:25:44,320
Listen, the school hired me because I'm
amazing at what I do.

407
00:25:44,680 --> 00:25:49,400
I use movies as one of my tools, but I
also use a variety of other multimedia

408
00:25:49,400 --> 00:25:50,400
techniques.

409
00:25:51,000 --> 00:25:54,300
Listen, I could take you day by day
through my entire syllabus, but that's

410
00:25:54,300 --> 00:25:55,300
not how I do things.

411
00:25:55,860 --> 00:25:59,900
So, that's my spiel, as the Jews say.

412
00:26:01,040 --> 00:26:04,100
Please help yourself to some delicious
snacks and drinks in the back.

413
00:26:06,120 --> 00:26:07,120
Class is missed.

414
00:26:07,760 --> 00:26:08,880
Excuse me, Miss Halsey.

415
00:26:09,600 --> 00:26:10,940
Hi, I'm Morgan's dad.

416
00:26:12,500 --> 00:26:13,500
Morgan.

417
00:26:14,780 --> 00:26:15,780
Great kid.

418
00:26:16,000 --> 00:26:17,000
So precocious.

419
00:26:17,260 --> 00:26:19,320
I just wish Morgan's grades would
reflect it.

420
00:26:19,520 --> 00:26:24,660
If I know Morgan, and I think I do,
Morgan will get there.

421
00:26:24,960 --> 00:26:28,200
Listen, I'm sure you have a full plate,
along with a rocking hot body.

422
00:26:28,700 --> 00:26:31,960
But if you could just keep an eye on
Morgan, my wife and I would really

423
00:26:31,960 --> 00:26:32,960
appreciate it.

424
00:26:33,100 --> 00:26:35,940
For supplies and whatever.

425
00:26:38,320 --> 00:26:39,320
For supplies?

426
00:26:40,700 --> 00:26:42,040
You're Chase's parents.

427
00:26:42,660 --> 00:26:47,300
Hi! You know, a student like Chase would
benefit so much from some extra

428
00:26:47,300 --> 00:26:48,300
attention.

429
00:26:48,480 --> 00:26:50,500
So you think we should hire a tutor?

430
00:26:50,700 --> 00:26:54,480
You know, I'd be happy to do it myself,
but it's just so hard with a class of 20

431
00:26:54,480 --> 00:26:56,820
or 25 or 30 or whatever.

432
00:26:57,820 --> 00:26:58,820
To be a teacher.

433
00:26:58,880 --> 00:27:03,200
God, it is so hard on my salary to have
to pay for my own supplies and my

434
00:27:03,200 --> 00:27:05,020
fiancé, he cheated on me with his
sister.

435
00:27:06,480 --> 00:27:10,700
As her personal tutor, I guarantee
personally that she will get an A.

436
00:27:11,060 --> 00:27:13,140
Or your money back.

437
00:27:14,500 --> 00:27:16,920
Well, say no more.

438
00:27:20,060 --> 00:27:21,160
Make it out to cash.

439
00:27:22,190 --> 00:27:26,350
As I walk through the valley of the
shadow of death, I take a look at my

440
00:27:26,350 --> 00:27:27,970
and realize it's not enough.

441
00:27:28,210 --> 00:27:32,730
Because I've been blasting and laughing
so long that even my mama thinks that my

442
00:27:32,730 --> 00:27:37,030
mind is gone. But I ain't never crossed
a man that didn't deserve it. Me be

443
00:27:37,030 --> 00:27:39,670
treated like a punk, you know that's
unheard of.

444
00:27:40,830 --> 00:27:44,230
Is that true? When I go to my grave, my
head will be high.

445
00:27:45,290 --> 00:27:47,230
There are no victims in this classroom.

446
00:28:15,950 --> 00:28:17,870
You didn't have to do that. Oh, got in
it.

447
00:28:18,210 --> 00:28:19,730
Oh, my favorite book.

448
00:28:22,310 --> 00:28:23,310
Eat, Pray, Love.

449
00:28:23,890 --> 00:28:24,890
Yeah.

450
00:28:26,070 --> 00:28:28,230
This is my favorite book, too.

451
00:28:29,710 --> 00:28:30,950
What's your favorite part?

452
00:28:33,350 --> 00:28:34,350
Love.

453
00:28:52,040 --> 00:28:53,260
No, it's medicinal marijuana.

454
00:28:53,940 --> 00:28:55,360
I have a prescription and everything.

455
00:28:56,040 --> 00:28:58,520
But I'm not going to tell you why
because it's between me and my doctor.

456
00:28:58,820 --> 00:28:59,820
Oh.

457
00:29:00,200 --> 00:29:02,500
Okay, well, I feel better.

458
00:29:03,100 --> 00:29:06,380
Thanks. Um, my mom and I made you some
holiday cookies.

459
00:29:07,440 --> 00:29:08,760
Are those oatmeal raisin again?

460
00:29:09,280 --> 00:29:10,280
Gingerbread.

461
00:29:12,660 --> 00:29:14,500
Let me see. Have it.

462
00:29:14,840 --> 00:29:15,840
Watch the bow.

463
00:29:19,740 --> 00:29:20,900
Is everything a drink?

464
00:29:23,560 --> 00:29:27,740
Listen, word to the wise, stop dressing
like you're running for Congress.

465
00:29:28,400 --> 00:29:29,640
I don't want to run for Congress.

466
00:29:29,900 --> 00:29:30,900
I want to be president.

467
00:29:31,360 --> 00:29:32,480
See, that's what I'm talking about.

468
00:29:33,160 --> 00:29:34,880
Keep saying shit like that, you're going
to get punched.

469
00:29:36,520 --> 00:29:39,160
Do you really want to be president, or
is that something your parents want?

470
00:29:42,600 --> 00:29:44,200
Look, you don't have to decide right
now.

471
00:29:44,820 --> 00:29:47,740
You know, who knows? One day you wake
up, you decide you want to be a

472
00:29:48,700 --> 00:29:49,700
Salary plus tips.

473
00:29:50,380 --> 00:29:51,380
Think about it.

474
00:29:52,880 --> 00:29:55,000
If I think about it, will I get extra
credit?

475
00:29:56,460 --> 00:29:58,220
Hopeless. Watch your feet.

476
00:30:16,320 --> 00:30:18,700
This is indeed a winter wonderland.

477
00:30:24,270 --> 00:30:25,009
Want to go get high?

478
00:30:25,010 --> 00:30:26,010
Yeah.

479
00:30:26,290 --> 00:30:28,090
Give me a mug. I'll go smoke it in my
car.

480
00:30:29,130 --> 00:30:30,310
Wow. No.

481
00:30:30,690 --> 00:30:33,390
I meant, do you want to get high with
me?

482
00:30:34,810 --> 00:30:41,370
8 -6 -7 -5 -3 -0 -9 -9. 8 -6 -7 -5 -3 -0
-9 -9.

483
00:30:41,950 --> 00:30:46,770
I got it. I got it. I got it. Hey, they
don't make songs like this anymore,

484
00:30:46,890 --> 00:30:49,010
right? You know, that's actually not
true, Scott.

485
00:30:49,210 --> 00:30:52,010
I'm writing a song right now called 8 -5
-5.

486
00:30:53,350 --> 00:30:54,350
824 -1777.

487
00:30:55,130 --> 00:30:56,410
Extension 777.

488
00:30:59,970 --> 00:31:03,510
You guys having an awesome time? Yes.
Oh, my God. I'd love to dance. I could

489
00:31:03,510 --> 00:31:04,510
dance all night.

490
00:31:04,630 --> 00:31:06,190
Hey, can we go somewhere and talk?

491
00:31:06,910 --> 00:31:08,490
Totally go for a talk right now.

492
00:31:13,410 --> 00:31:14,410
Okay.

493
00:31:17,630 --> 00:31:19,870
I don't know how to say this. I'm kind
of nervous.

494
00:31:20,330 --> 00:31:21,770
It's happening so quickly.

495
00:31:22,350 --> 00:31:24,550
You can tell me anything, Scott. You're
one of my best friends.

496
00:31:25,790 --> 00:31:26,930
I'm crushing on someone.

497
00:31:27,950 --> 00:31:29,310
I think you're pretty great, too.

498
00:31:29,870 --> 00:31:30,870
Thanks. It's Amy.

499
00:31:32,650 --> 00:31:33,790
Don't run into the hall!

500
00:31:36,990 --> 00:31:37,990
Kids.

501
00:31:38,250 --> 00:31:40,230
She's been amazing helping me deal with
my breakup.

502
00:31:40,650 --> 00:31:43,370
Yeah, I don't know her that well. I know
all the other teachers really hate her

503
00:31:43,370 --> 00:31:45,070
fucking guts, but I stay above all that
stuff.

504
00:31:45,990 --> 00:31:47,810
Can I be honest with you?

505
00:31:48,250 --> 00:31:49,250
Of course.

506
00:31:56,290 --> 00:31:57,290
Really? Yeah.

507
00:31:58,150 --> 00:32:01,770
Oh, he seems so, I don't know,
simpatico.

508
00:32:01,970 --> 00:32:02,970
Trust me.

509
00:32:03,410 --> 00:32:05,030
She's only using you for your money.

510
00:32:06,150 --> 00:32:07,150
What?

511
00:32:09,430 --> 00:32:10,430
Well, I feel stupid.

512
00:32:11,150 --> 00:32:12,170
No, Scott.

513
00:32:12,430 --> 00:32:13,430
Scott.

514
00:32:13,730 --> 00:32:14,730
Look at me.

515
00:32:15,070 --> 00:32:18,030
I'm going to get my breasts enlarged in
a couple of months, and when I recover

516
00:32:18,030 --> 00:32:21,490
from my surgery, you and I are going to
go out, and we are going to find awesome

517
00:32:21,490 --> 00:32:22,490
people for each other.

518
00:32:23,570 --> 00:32:24,570
That sounds nice.

519
00:32:25,370 --> 00:32:29,700
You're... Out of your mind. There is no
way that LeBron will ever beat Jordan.

520
00:32:29,740 --> 00:32:31,280
Nobody will ever beat Jordan, okay?

521
00:32:31,480 --> 00:32:33,300
Okay, LeBron's a better rebounder and
passer.

522
00:32:33,540 --> 00:32:34,540
Will you let me finish?

523
00:32:34,820 --> 00:32:36,300
Can you let me finish?

524
00:32:36,520 --> 00:32:38,580
Call me when LeBron has six
championships.

525
00:32:38,820 --> 00:32:41,300
Is that your only argument? It's the
only argument I need, Sean!

526
00:32:46,000 --> 00:32:47,000
Let's get baked.

527
00:32:49,180 --> 00:32:51,380
Good. We're going to go get some baked
good.

528
00:32:54,960 --> 00:32:55,960
You got this?

529
00:32:58,320 --> 00:32:59,320
Just try it.

530
00:33:00,080 --> 00:33:00,899
Try it.

531
00:33:00,900 --> 00:33:04,220
Please, don't stop pressuring her. How
does she know she doesn't like it if

532
00:33:04,220 --> 00:33:05,219
she's never tried it before?

533
00:33:05,220 --> 00:33:09,160
You know, we should probably be getting
back. Just fucking do it. We did

534
00:33:09,160 --> 00:33:10,160
awesome.

535
00:33:14,980 --> 00:33:21,500
Hold it in.

536
00:33:21,780 --> 00:33:23,600
Just blow it out. Hold it in. Blow it
out.

537
00:33:27,810 --> 00:33:28,810
Lynn, I'm going to take this.

538
00:33:30,010 --> 00:33:31,550
I'm going to go find a hot dog.

539
00:33:34,170 --> 00:33:35,170
Well,

540
00:33:35,650 --> 00:33:36,650
that was deeply unimpressive.

541
00:33:36,850 --> 00:33:37,850
Like you can do better.

542
00:33:38,250 --> 00:33:40,130
Really? Yeah. You sure you want to do
this? Gym teacher.

543
00:33:43,870 --> 00:33:44,930
You understand this is what I do.

544
00:33:45,210 --> 00:33:46,710
Yeah, I got it. Like for a living.

545
00:33:59,470 --> 00:34:00,810
You have no upper body strength.

546
00:34:01,010 --> 00:34:01,969
Yes, I do.

547
00:34:01,970 --> 00:34:03,810
Just not in my arms or my chest.

548
00:34:04,390 --> 00:34:06,430
But I have reflexes. Thanks God for it.

549
00:34:18,810 --> 00:34:21,969
So all this is mine, by the way, as far
as the eye can see.

550
00:34:22,850 --> 00:34:24,409
Really love what you've done with the
place.

551
00:34:24,750 --> 00:34:27,650
You have to know it's the net. It was a
brand new net that I had installed.

552
00:34:28,400 --> 00:34:29,400
It's the original wood.

553
00:34:30,360 --> 00:34:31,639
See those championship banners?

554
00:34:32,480 --> 00:34:34,300
When I first came to the school, they
weren't here.

555
00:34:35,420 --> 00:34:36,420
They were over there.

556
00:34:37,219 --> 00:34:38,639
I had them moved over there.

557
00:34:41,400 --> 00:34:46,199
So, Russell, what has to go wrong in
someone's life for them to end up being

558
00:34:46,199 --> 00:34:47,219
middle school gym teacher?

559
00:34:48,159 --> 00:34:51,920
Well, granted, it wasn't the original
plan. As a young boy, I wanted to be a

560
00:34:51,920 --> 00:34:56,880
professor of physical education at
Harvard.

561
00:34:59,240 --> 00:35:00,580
I don't know. I like it here.

562
00:35:01,120 --> 00:35:04,200
What went so wrong in your life that you
ended up educating children?

563
00:35:04,920 --> 00:35:05,920
I don't know.

564
00:35:06,460 --> 00:35:08,340
Maybe I was a bad person in another
life.

565
00:35:10,720 --> 00:35:12,700
We should, like, go have a drink
sometime.

566
00:35:13,260 --> 00:35:15,080
Together. Like over winter break.

567
00:35:15,400 --> 00:35:16,400
Nah.

568
00:35:16,620 --> 00:35:17,620
Got something brewing.

569
00:35:18,140 --> 00:35:19,620
Can I say something for the record?

570
00:35:20,020 --> 00:35:26,200
Fine. It's about your... the... the big
fake titties.

571
00:35:26,540 --> 00:35:27,700
Are you really gonna do that?

572
00:35:28,040 --> 00:35:28,968
Uh -huh.

573
00:35:28,970 --> 00:35:32,270
Why would you do that? Your tits are
fine. I like your tits. That's my

574
00:35:41,470 --> 00:35:42,470
Seriously?

575
00:35:45,190 --> 00:35:46,190
Seriously?

576
00:35:50,010 --> 00:35:51,010
Seriously? Seriously?

577
00:35:54,690 --> 00:35:55,690
Hey,

578
00:35:56,070 --> 00:35:57,690
why are they closed?

579
00:35:58,200 --> 00:35:59,200
It's Christmas?

580
00:35:59,820 --> 00:36:01,480
Whatever. Hey, you got a lighter?

581
00:36:02,640 --> 00:36:05,440
Hey, Miss Halsey, it's me, Garrett, from
school.

582
00:36:05,700 --> 00:36:07,580
Oh, Garrett, having a nice Christmas?

583
00:36:08,600 --> 00:36:11,420
Aces. Aw, what are you doing the rest of
the day? You gonna go see your family?

584
00:36:11,760 --> 00:36:13,880
Uh, you know, I'm gonna go see some
people.

585
00:36:14,120 --> 00:36:20,740
We're having, like, a big potluck, so...
Miss Halsey, would you like to come and

586
00:36:20,740 --> 00:36:21,800
spend Christmas with us?

587
00:36:30,540 --> 00:36:37,040
This is the season to be jolly. La, la,
la, la, la, la, la, la, la.

588
00:36:37,880 --> 00:36:40,940
Tell me something else. How do we
remember?

589
00:36:41,220 --> 00:36:42,220
We forget.

590
00:36:42,320 --> 00:36:43,299
What is that?

591
00:36:43,300 --> 00:36:46,560
I'm really sorry. I have to eat and run.
I got to head over to the shelter, so.

592
00:36:46,880 --> 00:36:48,460
Aw. The shelter.

593
00:36:48,760 --> 00:36:50,160
Ah, that's so inspiring.

594
00:36:50,520 --> 00:36:52,280
Yeah, I really love helping bums.

595
00:36:53,160 --> 00:36:55,420
But you have to wait for dessert. We
have a real treat.

596
00:36:56,040 --> 00:36:58,180
Garrett, why don't you run and get some
of your new poetry?

597
00:36:58,840 --> 00:37:00,360
No one wants to hear it.

598
00:37:00,620 --> 00:37:02,120
God, I'm so embarrassed.

599
00:37:02,500 --> 00:37:03,840
Don't be shy, Marvel.

600
00:37:04,540 --> 00:37:07,360
This is called The Chase by Garrett
Ciara.

601
00:37:10,320 --> 00:37:17,320
XOXO, my love for you is XOXO. About her
smile that I would walk a mile

602
00:37:17,320 --> 00:37:22,400
for. About her personality that makes me
see the best in me.

603
00:37:22,960 --> 00:37:29,600
One glance, one dance, because
together... we can achieve balance

604
00:37:29,600 --> 00:37:31,560
thinking.

605
00:37:34,480 --> 00:37:37,640
I loved it, and I usually hate poetry.

606
00:37:38,080 --> 00:37:40,140
Oh, Philip, hate on Christmas?

607
00:37:40,560 --> 00:37:41,560
Sorry, Santa.

608
00:37:41,920 --> 00:37:42,920
Sorry, Jesus.

609
00:37:44,420 --> 00:37:48,800
Um, why don't you two give me a hand
with dessert, and we can let these two

610
00:37:48,800 --> 00:37:49,800
discuss.

611
00:37:52,740 --> 00:37:55,400
So, a poem's about that girl.

612
00:37:56,599 --> 00:38:02,480
Yeah, she... If I could just talk to her
and tell her how I feel, I know she'd

613
00:38:02,480 --> 00:38:03,480
understand.

614
00:38:04,540 --> 00:38:06,780
Listen, it's not gonna happen, buddy.

615
00:38:07,640 --> 00:38:08,900
I was that hot girl.

616
00:38:09,520 --> 00:38:10,399
Hotter, even.

617
00:38:10,400 --> 00:38:11,880
And I would never have gone out with
you.

618
00:38:12,520 --> 00:38:14,840
And I'm not saying that to be mean. I'm
saying that to be helpful.

619
00:38:15,240 --> 00:38:17,120
What do you know? You don't even know
our names.

620
00:38:17,580 --> 00:38:20,640
I'll tell you what I know. A kid who
wears the same gymnastic sweatshirt

621
00:38:20,640 --> 00:38:22,460
days a week isn't getting laid until
he's 29.

622
00:38:22,740 --> 00:38:23,740
That's what I know.

623
00:38:24,140 --> 00:38:27,360
The sweatshirt was my dad's. That's all
he left me when he left me.

624
00:38:27,780 --> 00:38:29,400
There's a reason he didn't pack it.

625
00:38:30,840 --> 00:38:31,840
Just saying.

626
00:38:32,520 --> 00:38:36,940
Welcome to the number one New Year's Eve
party in the entire world.

627
00:38:37,160 --> 00:38:40,700
This is literally the biggest party on
Earth. Aren't you going out with the

628
00:38:40,700 --> 00:38:41,700
other nurses?

629
00:38:42,520 --> 00:38:43,520
I'm not a nurse.

630
00:38:44,380 --> 00:38:45,660
I thought you were a nurse.

631
00:38:46,320 --> 00:38:47,320
I'm a teacher.

632
00:39:23,080 --> 00:39:24,080
Welcome back.

633
00:39:24,840 --> 00:39:29,000
A bunch of us are going out tonight to
see Period 5 play. Do you want to come?

634
00:39:29,540 --> 00:39:30,538
Period 5?

635
00:39:30,540 --> 00:39:31,620
Yeah, the teacher band.

636
00:39:33,040 --> 00:39:34,740
I really get shot in the face.

637
00:39:37,100 --> 00:39:38,100
Hey.

638
00:39:39,200 --> 00:39:40,200
Hey.

639
00:39:40,800 --> 00:39:42,660
So, are you guys coming to the palace
tonight?

640
00:39:42,900 --> 00:39:44,280
My band's going to do a few songs.

641
00:39:44,740 --> 00:39:45,880
You're in Period 5.

642
00:39:46,260 --> 00:39:49,400
You're looking at the new rhythm
guitarist and backup vocalist.

643
00:39:49,850 --> 00:39:51,730
Should be fun. Should be amazing.

644
00:39:51,950 --> 00:39:52,950
Lynn, you want to come?

645
00:39:53,010 --> 00:39:54,450
Yeah. Yeah.

646
00:39:55,850 --> 00:39:56,870
I love a bar.

647
00:39:59,990 --> 00:40:03,410
Rock -a -bye.

648
00:40:04,610 --> 00:40:05,690
Rock -a -bye.

649
00:40:20,160 --> 00:40:21,160
Like you guys.

650
00:40:21,920 --> 00:40:23,920
You should go talk to someone, Lynn.

651
00:40:24,400 --> 00:40:25,680
I'm fine here.

652
00:40:26,220 --> 00:40:28,740
Come on, Lynn. You need to loosen up and
live a little.

653
00:40:28,940 --> 00:40:31,820
When was the last time you had a good
dicking? A good dicking?

654
00:40:32,100 --> 00:40:33,960
Look, go talk to those guys over there.

655
00:40:35,200 --> 00:40:36,460
In the cowboy hat?

656
00:40:36,780 --> 00:40:37,780
Yeah.

657
00:40:38,240 --> 00:40:43,420
Come on. You come on. Go talk to them.
What am I going to talk about?

658
00:40:43,740 --> 00:40:44,740
It doesn't matter.

659
00:40:45,109 --> 00:40:48,350
Look, you go and you start with one of
them, then you start talking to the

660
00:40:48,350 --> 00:40:51,670
one, and then you go back to the first
one, but still be touching the other

661
00:40:51,730 --> 00:40:53,090
and then you just choose.

662
00:40:53,490 --> 00:40:56,630
Textbook. Yeah, from the world's
weirdest textbook.

663
00:40:57,050 --> 00:40:58,890
Let me finish my drink.

664
00:40:59,150 --> 00:41:00,530
Now, Lynn. One second.

665
00:41:00,750 --> 00:41:01,509
No, go.

666
00:41:01,510 --> 00:41:05,910
I like it here. It is really fun over
here. Lynn, get your ass over to those

667
00:41:05,910 --> 00:41:06,910
cowboys.

668
00:41:07,070 --> 00:41:08,070
Well,

669
00:41:08,590 --> 00:41:10,550
I'm glad I wore my fun underwear.

670
00:41:11,630 --> 00:41:12,630
Okay.

671
00:41:18,140 --> 00:41:22,140
So call me crazy, but this might be the
best period five show of all time.

672
00:41:22,600 --> 00:41:24,120
What are you doing here, anyway?

673
00:41:24,600 --> 00:41:26,560
I thought it was poetry slam night.

674
00:41:27,340 --> 00:41:28,960
Just gonna get drunk and mock them.

675
00:41:29,400 --> 00:41:30,400
Sounds fun, actually.

676
00:41:30,740 --> 00:41:32,140
I'll let you know next time I go.

677
00:41:32,400 --> 00:41:33,400
Not that fun.

678
00:41:34,380 --> 00:41:38,240
Okay, just so you know, that shit does
not faze me at all.

679
00:41:38,620 --> 00:41:42,260
I'm like the fucking Terminator, dude.
I'm just gonna keep coming after you.

680
00:41:42,560 --> 00:41:43,560
Just so we're clear.

681
00:41:44,400 --> 00:41:45,400
Good luck with that.

682
00:41:46,800 --> 00:41:47,800
Oh, shit.

683
00:41:48,600 --> 00:41:49,600
Check it out.

684
00:41:51,320 --> 00:41:52,320
I'll be damned.

685
00:41:53,400 --> 00:41:54,400
That shit works.

686
00:41:55,700 --> 00:41:56,700
Super fast.

687
00:42:04,460 --> 00:42:08,020
Wow, thank you guys for coming out. What
a turnout, right?

688
00:42:09,420 --> 00:42:15,280
I just want to take this opportunity to
thank the guys from Period 5 for letting

689
00:42:15,280 --> 00:42:16,280
me join the band.

690
00:42:16,700 --> 00:42:22,800
Also, I have an original song. It is my
first crack at songwriting, so be kind.

691
00:42:25,120 --> 00:42:28,220
And it goes out to someone very special.

692
00:42:30,560 --> 00:42:35,120
There was a girl I met some time ago,

693
00:42:35,500 --> 00:42:37,860
simpatico.

694
00:42:38,900 --> 00:42:44,940
She helped me heal, she helped me grow,
simpatico.

695
00:42:45,640 --> 00:42:50,000
How do you know when you know? I guess
you just know.

696
00:42:51,520 --> 00:42:56,700
Sympatico. Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa,
whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.

697
00:42:58,060 --> 00:42:59,060
Whoa.

698
00:43:00,420 --> 00:43:01,420
Sympatico.

699
00:43:01,920 --> 00:43:02,920
Exotico.

700
00:43:03,700 --> 00:43:04,700
Erotico.

701
00:43:05,900 --> 00:43:08,020
You're my narcotico.

702
00:43:09,860 --> 00:43:14,500
Ask me how much I feel. I'll say a
lotico.

703
00:43:26,740 --> 00:43:28,020
Fuck! Is it me?

704
00:43:28,500 --> 00:43:31,920
No, I don't... I mean, is there
something wrong with me? I don't think

705
00:43:31,920 --> 00:43:34,540
mean, sometimes you talk to people
and... Thank you.

706
00:43:35,460 --> 00:43:39,220
Forgetting. At least now you can stop
worrying about him and be the best

707
00:43:39,220 --> 00:43:41,740
you can be. I mean, who knows? Maybe
you'll win the bonus.

708
00:43:42,740 --> 00:43:44,980
What bonus? For the state tether.

709
00:43:45,340 --> 00:43:49,740
Whichever teacher has the highest
scoring class gets a bonus. Amy wins

710
00:43:49,740 --> 00:43:51,060
year. How much?

711
00:43:51,300 --> 00:43:52,300
$5 ,700.

712
00:43:53,960 --> 00:43:55,780
$5 ,700?

713
00:43:56,120 --> 00:43:57,600
Yeah. God damn it, Lynn.

714
00:43:57,880 --> 00:43:59,200
You never tell me anything.

715
00:43:59,540 --> 00:44:00,540
Yeah.

716
00:44:15,140 --> 00:44:18,800
TV. Now, everybody, open your tequila
mockingbirds to page one.

717
00:44:20,640 --> 00:44:21,640
Good.

718
00:44:22,060 --> 00:44:26,000
Now, who can tell me why Jem cries when
the hole in the tree is filled with

719
00:44:26,000 --> 00:44:27,940
cement? Because she's a crybaby?

720
00:44:29,580 --> 00:44:30,580
Get out.

721
00:44:35,000 --> 00:44:36,240
We're here to learn.

722
00:44:37,380 --> 00:44:38,820
Anybody else have a problem with that?

723
00:44:40,560 --> 00:44:43,020
Good. Now, who has the answer to my
question?

724
00:44:45,880 --> 00:44:46,880
Nobody's read this book?

725
00:44:48,280 --> 00:44:49,280
It's on the syllabus.

726
00:44:49,520 --> 00:44:51,420
Well, you never assigned it to us.

727
00:44:51,680 --> 00:44:52,680
Well, now I am.

728
00:44:53,120 --> 00:44:54,620
And we have a quiz tomorrow.

729
00:44:54,940 --> 00:44:56,880
What? On the first hundred pages.

730
00:45:00,780 --> 00:45:04,420
You can't do that. I have band and jazz
band tonight.

731
00:45:04,780 --> 00:45:06,060
You haven't had homework all year.

732
00:45:06,440 --> 00:45:11,120
Things are about to change around here.

733
00:45:12,060 --> 00:45:13,240
Recess is over.

734
00:45:18,080 --> 00:45:19,200
Good. Good, okay.

735
00:45:19,440 --> 00:45:21,740
Does anyone have anything to add to what
that girl just said?

736
00:45:25,240 --> 00:45:27,940
So, what are the limitations of having
Scout as the narrator?

737
00:45:29,800 --> 00:45:30,800
You. Chubb.

738
00:45:31,220 --> 00:45:34,360
Because he... Okay,

739
00:45:36,500 --> 00:45:37,500
go.

740
00:45:44,420 --> 00:45:47,110
Don't. Lynch. Seriously. You and you.
Hold his arms down.

741
00:45:48,890 --> 00:45:49,950
Next question.

742
00:45:50,370 --> 00:45:51,209
Come on.

743
00:45:51,210 --> 00:45:55,830
Because Atticus is always the voice of
reason and justice?

744
00:45:57,730 --> 00:45:59,430
Correct. Here.

745
00:46:00,590 --> 00:46:01,590
Nothing in the face.

746
00:46:03,190 --> 00:46:04,490
Whoa! Wait!

747
00:46:06,190 --> 00:46:07,510
Miss Halsey.

748
00:46:08,490 --> 00:46:09,830
Really? Wow.

749
00:46:10,170 --> 00:46:11,170
I never.

750
00:46:11,370 --> 00:46:12,830
We're in the middle of a lesson. Wow.

751
00:46:13,750 --> 00:46:15,320
Twilight. Look at me.

752
00:46:16,240 --> 00:46:17,520
What do we talk about in class?

753
00:46:19,200 --> 00:46:20,900
Your weight should be evenly
distributed.

754
00:46:21,180 --> 00:46:22,560
You gotta throw off the back foot.

755
00:46:23,120 --> 00:46:24,120
Don't throw at her.

756
00:46:24,420 --> 00:46:25,500
Throw through her.

757
00:46:28,000 --> 00:46:29,000
Bail her!

758
00:46:30,840 --> 00:46:36,960
This is so funny because I love Ravens
and he hates Ravens. Yin and yang.

759
00:46:37,880 --> 00:46:39,580
You guys are so cute.

760
00:46:39,960 --> 00:46:40,960
So cute.

761
00:46:41,120 --> 00:46:42,440
It's like too cute almost.

762
00:46:43,120 --> 00:46:44,760
Last weekend we went for a drive.

763
00:46:46,480 --> 00:46:50,860
We had no idea where we were going. We
left the maps at home.

764
00:46:51,200 --> 00:46:55,580
What? No way. It was fine. I have a GPS
Navi system.

765
00:46:56,140 --> 00:46:57,140
Oh, thank God.

766
00:46:57,440 --> 00:47:01,240
And we discovered this new Ethiopian
restaurant.

767
00:47:01,480 --> 00:47:02,980
They finally got their own cuisine.

768
00:47:03,660 --> 00:47:04,660
Progress.

769
00:47:07,620 --> 00:47:08,800
Hey, Miss Halsey.

770
00:47:09,480 --> 00:47:11,800
Hey. Your shirt's misbuttoned.

771
00:47:12,090 --> 00:47:13,090
I'm sure it's Ms. Sutton.

772
00:47:13,990 --> 00:47:17,950
Thank you, Amy, for pointing that out.
You're so welcome.

773
00:47:18,770 --> 00:47:22,910
God, I've just been such a mess this
week, you know, just working myself to

774
00:47:22,910 --> 00:47:25,510
bone. Yeah, it's been quite a change.

775
00:47:25,990 --> 00:47:26,990
Well, I think it's great.

776
00:47:27,170 --> 00:47:28,170
Yeah, it's great.

777
00:47:28,190 --> 00:47:31,310
I just love people who are so passionate
about what they do. It's so

778
00:47:31,310 --> 00:47:32,310
inspirational.

779
00:47:32,890 --> 00:47:36,390
Thanks. Yeah, you know, some teachers
just sail by doing that bare minimum

780
00:47:36,390 --> 00:47:38,150
thing. I don't know, it's just not me.

781
00:47:39,920 --> 00:47:42,140
It's good to know there's still some
actual educators out there.

782
00:47:44,780 --> 00:47:45,780
What else, Sasha?

783
00:47:46,420 --> 00:47:47,900
I think I've told you everything.

784
00:47:48,360 --> 00:47:51,100
Any more movies in class?

785
00:47:51,860 --> 00:47:55,120
No, we're actually learning. Hey, did
you know that Animal Farm isn't even

786
00:47:55,120 --> 00:47:56,120
really about animals?

787
00:47:56,660 --> 00:47:57,660
Animal Farm.

788
00:47:58,260 --> 00:48:00,260
Sasha, that's not even in syllabus.

789
00:48:00,980 --> 00:48:03,100
Yeah, I know you're forgetting
something.

790
00:48:05,770 --> 00:48:09,630
You want extra credit on your diorama or
not? I do. I want it. Okay, think.

791
00:48:09,970 --> 00:48:10,970
Let me think.

792
00:48:12,650 --> 00:48:13,770
Well, there was... What?

793
00:48:14,170 --> 00:48:15,089
Never mind.

794
00:48:15,090 --> 00:48:17,230
What? Well, it was okay. It was
medicinal.

795
00:48:20,850 --> 00:48:24,910
And if she claims it's medicinal, I
would demand to see a prescription.

796
00:48:25,590 --> 00:48:26,930
That's what I would do if I were you,
Wally.

797
00:48:27,150 --> 00:48:30,910
Do you have any proof other than what
one student thought she saw?

798
00:48:31,530 --> 00:48:36,630
Well, this... one student is in line to
be editor of the Daily Musket next year.

799
00:48:37,370 --> 00:48:40,870
She's got a lot to lose going public
with this. If the teachers' union found

800
00:48:40,870 --> 00:48:44,510
that I was administering a drug test to
a teacher with this little proof, they

801
00:48:44,510 --> 00:48:46,270
would make my life a living hell, Amy.

802
00:48:46,530 --> 00:48:47,950
So we're just going to let her walk
free?

803
00:48:48,790 --> 00:48:49,790
Huh?

804
00:48:50,010 --> 00:48:51,490
That's it. That's bonkers!

805
00:48:53,430 --> 00:48:54,430
Amy. Amy.

806
00:48:55,470 --> 00:48:56,470
Amy.

807
00:48:56,570 --> 00:48:57,790
Stop that. Stop it.

808
00:48:59,410 --> 00:49:00,670
Sorry. Sit down.

809
00:49:05,020 --> 00:49:08,740
Amy, do you see this beautiful little
glass dolphin figurine?

810
00:49:09,000 --> 00:49:10,040
Look at it.

811
00:49:11,300 --> 00:49:12,820
Look at it.

812
00:49:13,340 --> 00:49:16,160
Elizabeth gave this to me.

813
00:49:16,600 --> 00:49:20,220
She's a thoughtful young woman and she
is teaching for all the right reasons.

814
00:49:21,060 --> 00:49:25,800
Can you see she is manipulating you
through the use of dolphins?

815
00:49:26,240 --> 00:49:30,560
No, what I see is that you are getting
worked up. And what I would hate to see

816
00:49:30,560 --> 00:49:32,480
is for you to get...

817
00:49:34,890 --> 00:49:36,630
Overwhelmed. Like you did in 2008.

818
00:49:38,810 --> 00:49:41,010
Gotcha. Thanks, Wally, for bringing that
up.

819
00:49:43,130 --> 00:49:44,130
I'm all about that.

820
00:49:48,310 --> 00:49:49,430
Don't do that with your mouth.

821
00:49:51,790 --> 00:49:52,790
Regular mouth.

822
00:49:59,050 --> 00:50:04,410
Atticus Finch is a good lawyer because
he's a good person who's a lawyer.

823
00:50:06,890 --> 00:50:09,070
Stupid. Point.

824
00:50:09,870 --> 00:50:10,870
Spell.

825
00:50:15,810 --> 00:50:18,330
Is this English?

826
00:50:22,950 --> 00:50:27,150
Are you fucking kidding?

827
00:50:31,520 --> 00:50:32,520
Me. Pathetic.

828
00:50:32,940 --> 00:50:34,740
This is why the Japs are overtaking us.

829
00:50:34,980 --> 00:50:36,360
And believe me, I don't mean you.

830
00:50:38,240 --> 00:50:40,460
But we're working really hard.

831
00:50:41,780 --> 00:50:44,340
You're not working hard enough. I need
results.

832
00:50:44,960 --> 00:50:45,960
Class dismissed.

833
00:51:09,610 --> 00:51:10,610
How may I direct your call?

834
00:51:11,230 --> 00:51:14,490
Hi, my name is Marjorie Goodman, and I'm
calling from the Chicago Tribune.

835
00:51:15,150 --> 00:51:19,070
Who can I speak to regarding the
allegations of racial bias on your

836
00:51:19,070 --> 00:51:20,070
test?

837
00:51:20,490 --> 00:51:21,490
Please hold.

838
00:51:32,090 --> 00:51:33,090
Marjorie?

839
00:51:33,990 --> 00:51:34,990
You must be Carl.

840
00:51:36,190 --> 00:51:38,070
Thank you for meeting me on such short
notice.

841
00:51:38,540 --> 00:51:39,740
Of course. Sure.

842
00:51:40,680 --> 00:51:44,360
Hey, did you find the place okay? Was it
a good drive? Great drive.

843
00:51:44,580 --> 00:51:48,760
Listen, Carl, I know that you're a very
busy man, so I'm just going to get right

844
00:51:48,760 --> 00:51:49,760
down to it.

845
00:51:49,920 --> 00:51:56,500
I've been speaking to various black
citizens who allege that your tests are

846
00:51:56,500 --> 00:51:58,720
biased towards white people and
Orientals.

847
00:51:59,080 --> 00:52:03,560
Okay. Let me tell you something right
away. A, Orientals test better.

848
00:52:04,240 --> 00:52:09,240
B, every couple of years, we get...
These cockamamie charges coming in from

849
00:52:09,240 --> 00:52:12,460
various parts of the state. You should
hear the things that they call me.

850
00:52:13,300 --> 00:52:16,240
Racist and faggotron and faggy Hitler,
dick breath.

851
00:52:16,800 --> 00:52:19,420
Okay? But I am not a racist.

852
00:52:19,960 --> 00:52:22,660
I voted for Obama. You can quote me on
that in your article.

853
00:52:22,860 --> 00:52:24,240
You know what I think would help, Carl?

854
00:52:24,880 --> 00:52:27,180
For me to see one of this year's tests.

855
00:52:27,540 --> 00:52:29,380
Oh, sure. I can get you one easy.

856
00:52:29,820 --> 00:52:30,718
No problem.

857
00:52:30,720 --> 00:52:31,920
Great. Great.

858
00:52:32,240 --> 00:52:36,320
The day after the schools administer
them, I will shoot one right over to

859
00:52:36,640 --> 00:52:39,400
I was hoping to see it sooner. I'm on a
bit of a deadline.

860
00:52:39,680 --> 00:52:41,580
No, that is absolutely classified.

861
00:52:41,840 --> 00:52:44,380
Unless you have one of these bad boys
right here.

862
00:52:44,700 --> 00:52:45,700
Wow.

863
00:52:46,060 --> 00:52:50,200
You know, Carl, enough business for one
night, don't you think?

864
00:52:50,580 --> 00:52:53,980
Oh, tell me about that. I think I'm
going to have another drink before I hit

865
00:52:53,980 --> 00:52:54,980
road.

866
00:52:55,060 --> 00:52:59,420
You know, it's like the freedom and the
wind in your hair. Obviously the image.

867
00:53:00,140 --> 00:53:04,910
But then the other side is like...
Mopeds are scary, so count me out. You

868
00:53:04,910 --> 00:53:06,390
like such a wild man, Carl.

869
00:53:07,230 --> 00:53:10,830
What turns you on, Carl?

870
00:53:13,550 --> 00:53:14,550
Everything.

871
00:53:14,850 --> 00:53:16,530
You want to know what turns me on?

872
00:53:17,710 --> 00:53:18,890
Sex in an office.

873
00:53:19,590 --> 00:53:22,490
Getting fucked really hard against a
wooden desk.

874
00:53:25,330 --> 00:53:26,330
Mine's metal.

875
00:53:26,510 --> 00:53:27,510
Even better.

876
00:53:28,770 --> 00:53:29,850
And voila!

877
00:53:32,210 --> 00:53:35,690
So, this is the desk.

878
00:53:37,270 --> 00:53:38,610
Do you have anything to drink?

879
00:53:39,770 --> 00:53:41,770
Uh, yes, I do.

880
00:53:44,410 --> 00:53:47,850
Voila! Ooh, white wine in the office.

881
00:53:48,230 --> 00:53:49,230
Bad boy.

882
00:53:49,630 --> 00:53:51,230
Do you have any music, Carl?

883
00:53:51,610 --> 00:53:52,750
I have the internet radio.

884
00:53:53,130 --> 00:53:55,410
I love internet radio.

885
00:53:56,750 --> 00:54:00,210
You've come to the right place, because
I have that.

886
00:54:01,770 --> 00:54:04,430
See, I am not a whiz at this computer
here.

887
00:54:05,510 --> 00:54:11,270
It's relatively new, and Grace, who
works with me on Mondays and Wednesdays

888
00:54:11,270 --> 00:54:14,330
Thursdays, and I share her with Greg
across the way.

889
00:54:14,730 --> 00:54:17,630
Greg across the hall is actually the guy
who got me into spinning.

890
00:54:18,190 --> 00:54:19,250
Oh, there we go.

891
00:54:23,570 --> 00:54:24,570
Shall we toast?

892
00:54:25,530 --> 00:54:26,530
To new friends.

893
00:54:26,870 --> 00:54:27,870
And new lovers.

894
00:54:44,940 --> 00:54:47,640
I got my shoes. Is that okay? Whatever,
man. I'm going to go hit the ladies'

895
00:54:47,660 --> 00:54:51,320
room. Okay. There's a handicapped one.
It's way closer. Use the handicapped

896
00:54:51,340 --> 00:54:52,340
It's way closer.

897
00:55:18,700 --> 00:55:19,700
I took off my shoes.

898
00:55:20,120 --> 00:55:21,120
Oh, Carl.

899
00:55:21,560 --> 00:55:23,600
I want to fuck you against the desk.

900
00:55:24,380 --> 00:55:26,000
I want to fuck you against the desk.

901
00:55:26,220 --> 00:55:28,720
Carl, I'm going to need you to pass the
fuck out.

902
00:55:29,160 --> 00:55:34,320
Mother, I am going to rock your vagina.

903
00:55:36,040 --> 00:55:38,160
That wine is good.

904
00:55:38,940 --> 00:55:39,940
Oh, Mother.

905
00:55:40,100 --> 00:55:41,100
How did you do?

906
00:55:50,200 --> 00:55:51,200
Titties.

907
00:55:53,380 --> 00:55:59,320
If anyone has any information regarding
the missing Annie wig, please let me

908
00:55:59,320 --> 00:56:00,320
know ASAP.

909
00:56:00,860 --> 00:56:01,900
Come on, guys.

910
00:56:02,140 --> 00:56:03,260
There's a wig missing.

911
00:56:03,700 --> 00:56:08,800
Because if that wig isn't found, you can
bet your bottom dollar the sun will not

912
00:56:08,800 --> 00:56:09,800
come out tomorrow.

913
00:56:11,300 --> 00:56:12,420
Back to you, Wally.

914
00:56:13,260 --> 00:56:16,480
Okay, thank you, Amy. I'm sure everybody
wants to get home, so I'm going to be

915
00:56:16,480 --> 00:56:19,220
quick. I was gone seven years ago.

916
00:56:25,030 --> 00:56:26,350
God damn it, Sandy.

917
00:56:27,290 --> 00:56:28,290
Sandy's so funny.

918
00:56:30,310 --> 00:56:34,090
I have here the results of the state
exam.

919
00:56:34,470 --> 00:56:39,410
And I'm happy to announce that the John
Adams Middle School, that's us, scored

920
00:56:39,410 --> 00:56:41,330
in the top 5 % of the whole state.

921
00:56:49,290 --> 00:56:52,970
I want to sing about one of our own who
showed that with hard work and

922
00:56:52,970 --> 00:56:55,470
dedication, one teacher can make a
difference.

923
00:56:56,910 --> 00:57:03,810
And this teacher is now $5 ,700 richer
with the highest scores in Cook County.

924
00:57:04,050 --> 00:57:05,330
That's the whole county.

925
00:57:05,890 --> 00:57:10,550
I want everyone to give a big round of
applause to Elizabeth Halsey.

926
00:57:13,270 --> 00:57:18,250
Well done.

927
00:57:23,680 --> 00:57:25,320
Congratulations, Miss Halsey.

928
00:57:26,380 --> 00:57:27,380
Thanks, dude.

929
00:57:28,960 --> 00:57:32,640
Well, if it isn't Professor Smarty
Pants. Don't mess with me. I'm a lot

930
00:57:32,640 --> 00:57:33,640
than I look.

931
00:57:34,180 --> 00:57:38,300
Hey, Elizabeth, I am so proud of you.

932
00:57:38,920 --> 00:57:44,200
I mean, if someone told me at the
beginning of the year that you, you

933
00:57:44,200 --> 00:57:47,240
the bonus, I would have said to whomever
it was.

934
00:57:47,790 --> 00:57:48,790
No way.

935
00:57:49,210 --> 00:57:53,890
Absolutely not. And now, here we are.

936
00:57:54,410 --> 00:57:55,810
We should go out and celebrate.

937
00:57:56,130 --> 00:57:57,130
You're a treat.

938
00:57:57,210 --> 00:58:01,950
Yeah, unfortunately, Elizabeth, Scott
and I have to go over the itinerary for

939
00:58:01,950 --> 00:58:05,870
the Springfield trip. Yeah, where the
chaperones were going together.

940
00:58:07,030 --> 00:58:10,030
We're dating, so it'll also be romantic.

941
00:58:10,530 --> 00:58:11,509
How fun.

942
00:58:11,510 --> 00:58:12,510
Yeah.

943
00:58:12,610 --> 00:58:14,290
You're not seeing anyone now, right?

944
00:58:18,660 --> 00:58:19,660
Almost done.

945
00:58:20,900 --> 00:58:22,240
Okay, so that's endorsed.

946
00:58:22,620 --> 00:58:24,280
And put the rest on these.

947
00:58:26,280 --> 00:58:27,820
Let it. All right.

948
00:58:28,560 --> 00:58:29,560
Okay.

949
00:59:07,920 --> 00:59:09,400
next to your sticker on their all -star
board?

950
00:59:10,460 --> 00:59:11,860
Who brought you to me?

951
00:59:12,160 --> 00:59:13,280
Oh, Mr.

952
00:59:13,580 --> 00:59:14,580
Apple.

953
00:59:15,100 --> 00:59:16,100
Ooh.

954
00:59:16,740 --> 00:59:20,000
What was that, Mr. Apple?

955
00:59:21,640 --> 00:59:23,300
You want me to take a bite?

956
00:59:24,420 --> 00:59:25,740
All righty -roo.

957
00:59:29,140 --> 00:59:30,140
Mmm.

958
00:59:31,260 --> 00:59:33,880
Elizabeth, I just want to thank you
again for stepping in today. You really

959
00:59:33,880 --> 00:59:34,759
saved us here.

960
00:59:34,760 --> 00:59:35,760
No problem.

961
00:59:35,780 --> 00:59:36,920
Hey, is Amy going to be okay?

962
00:59:37,520 --> 00:59:38,520
Yeah, I mean, he's going to be fine.

963
00:59:38,760 --> 00:59:39,980
Well, let her know she's alive.

964
00:59:46,040 --> 00:59:47,520
Hey, Arkady!

965
00:59:48,260 --> 00:59:49,480
Someone's calling my name.

966
00:59:50,220 --> 00:59:54,580
Hey, Arkady! I dare you. I'm not afraid
of your dares, Rodrigo.

967
00:59:59,280 --> 01:00:00,540
It's really dangerous, Russell.

968
01:00:01,700 --> 01:00:02,780
I'll call you from the hotel.

969
01:00:03,320 --> 01:00:04,320
Bye, Amy.

970
01:00:05,020 --> 01:00:06,620
Yeah, she's sitting right next to me.

971
01:00:08,460 --> 01:00:09,540
Thanks for calling again.

972
01:00:12,440 --> 01:00:13,440
Amy says hi.

973
01:00:13,680 --> 01:00:15,160
Wow, she sure calls a lot.

974
01:00:15,400 --> 01:00:18,040
So, are you excited about your surgery?

975
01:00:19,220 --> 01:00:21,040
I've never been more excited about
anything.

976
01:00:21,760 --> 01:00:23,780
It's a pretty inspiring message to the
kids.

977
01:00:24,440 --> 01:00:26,640
We should never stop working on
ourselves.

978
01:00:27,600 --> 01:00:31,740
Like you with your little boobs. Or me
experimenting with ethnic food.

979
01:01:14,029 --> 01:01:15,790
I never lose my keys.

980
01:01:17,150 --> 01:01:18,430
Such a ding -a -ling.

981
01:01:19,790 --> 01:01:20,990
What's wrong with your face?

982
01:01:21,350 --> 01:01:22,530
What is wrong with your face?

983
01:01:23,090 --> 01:01:25,010
Hey, I'm just trying to make
conversation.

984
01:01:25,850 --> 01:01:26,850
You're all done.

985
01:01:27,110 --> 01:01:28,710
Super. Thanks a bunch, Amos.

986
01:01:51,980 --> 01:01:55,580
That is definitely Marjorie, only with
kind of weird hair here. In real life,

987
01:01:55,600 --> 01:01:56,600
she's actually very pretty.

988
01:01:56,840 --> 01:01:57,840
You in some kind of trouble?

989
01:01:58,340 --> 01:02:01,920
Marjorie, I think you're the one who
might be in some kind of trouble.

990
01:02:02,580 --> 01:02:05,740
Did you or did you not give her a copy
of a state test?

991
01:02:07,280 --> 01:02:08,520
No, no, no.

992
01:02:08,820 --> 01:02:10,620
Absolutely not.

993
01:02:10,820 --> 01:02:14,600
No, I did give her some quotes for her
article.

994
01:02:14,980 --> 01:02:15,980
What article?

995
01:02:16,180 --> 01:02:18,820
Her article for the Tribune. She's a
reporter there, right?

996
01:02:23,530 --> 01:02:24,530
That tampering.

997
01:02:24,650 --> 01:02:25,690
That jams.

998
01:02:26,070 --> 01:02:29,630
This time I have a witness, and like I
said, Wally, she stole the Annie wig.

999
01:02:29,850 --> 01:02:32,390
We're dealing with a criminal
mastermind.

1000
01:02:32,990 --> 01:02:35,230
Sorry it'll be the bare bad news, Walsh.

1001
01:02:35,730 --> 01:02:38,390
You know how much we all love her.

1002
01:02:40,830 --> 01:02:43,830
Okay, well, you know, I have to call the
superintendent. We're going to have to

1003
01:02:43,830 --> 01:02:46,310
cross -check her entire class of Gordon.

1004
01:02:46,710 --> 01:02:48,990
This is a real shit sandwich.

1005
01:02:49,770 --> 01:02:51,970
Of course, you know what scares me the
most, Walsh?

1006
01:02:52,220 --> 01:02:53,960
This is just what we know, right?

1007
01:02:54,500 --> 01:02:56,740
Who knows what else she's capable of?

1008
01:03:00,820 --> 01:03:01,920
How awful.

1009
01:03:09,920 --> 01:03:10,920
Fruit roll -up?

1010
01:03:11,580 --> 01:03:15,380
You know, when President Lincoln
abolished slavery, it was not a popular

1011
01:03:15,380 --> 01:03:16,380
opinion.

1012
01:03:16,760 --> 01:03:20,280
I just hate slavery so, so much.

1013
01:03:21,870 --> 01:03:22,870
Slavery's the worst.

1014
01:03:23,930 --> 01:03:28,010
If I could go back in time and undo
slavery, I would.

1015
01:03:29,370 --> 01:03:30,370
I hate it.

1016
01:03:31,470 --> 01:03:35,130
Hey, I'm sorry to interrupt, guys, but I
couldn't help but overhear your

1017
01:03:35,130 --> 01:03:36,130
conversation.

1018
01:03:36,350 --> 01:03:37,770
Can I tell you guys what I hate?

1019
01:03:38,970 --> 01:03:43,290
Sharks. Well, sharks can tear families
apart.

1020
01:03:43,790 --> 01:03:45,010
But they're also so majestic.

1021
01:03:45,610 --> 01:03:46,970
They are beautiful creatures.

1022
01:03:47,310 --> 01:03:49,710
But they're also so ferocious. So
ferocious.

1023
01:03:51,020 --> 01:03:52,660
One of nature's cruel jokes, I guess.

1024
01:03:54,800 --> 01:03:55,800
Okay.

1025
01:03:58,280 --> 01:04:00,340
Thank you, Elizabeth, for listening.

1026
01:04:01,580 --> 01:04:04,820
Scott, I want you to know you can talk
to me about anything.

1027
01:04:26,570 --> 01:04:28,610
Your jeans feel so good against my
jeans.

1028
01:04:29,810 --> 01:04:30,810
Totally.

1029
01:04:31,470 --> 01:04:32,970
Your body feels so good.

1030
01:04:33,570 --> 01:04:34,670
Oh, I need some water.

1031
01:04:57,930 --> 01:05:00,690
I'm dry humping the shit out of you. Oh,
yeah, dry fuck the fuck out of me,

1032
01:05:00,730 --> 01:05:01,730
Scott.

1033
01:05:02,010 --> 01:05:03,010
Just stop talking.

1034
01:05:06,230 --> 01:05:07,230
I'm close.

1035
01:05:08,670 --> 01:05:09,670
Don't move.

1036
01:05:10,930 --> 01:05:11,930
Here I go.

1037
01:05:13,310 --> 01:05:14,310
Almost.

1038
01:05:15,610 --> 01:05:16,610
Wait for it.

1039
01:05:18,810 --> 01:05:19,810
Really close.

1040
01:05:19,850 --> 01:05:21,330
Ready? Yeah.

1041
01:05:22,010 --> 01:05:23,010
Just stop talking.

1042
01:05:24,030 --> 01:05:25,030
Oh, yeah.

1043
01:05:26,130 --> 01:05:27,130
Almost there.

1044
01:05:42,220 --> 01:05:42,999
I'm going to get going.

1045
01:05:43,000 --> 01:05:45,120
I don't want the kids to see me leaving
your room.

1046
01:05:45,420 --> 01:05:46,420
Yeah.

1047
01:05:47,560 --> 01:05:48,560
God.

1048
01:05:49,440 --> 01:05:50,860
We are so simpatico.

1049
01:05:52,180 --> 01:05:56,100
Maybe next time we can dry up without
our clothes on.

1050
01:05:56,440 --> 01:05:57,840
I'm pretty sure I'd like that.

1051
01:06:07,120 --> 01:06:08,440
Even your forehead is sexy.

1052
01:06:09,460 --> 01:06:11,520
Well, time for bed.

1053
01:06:16,170 --> 01:06:17,170
See you in the manana.

1054
01:06:18,990 --> 01:06:19,990
Elizabeth.

1055
01:06:20,770 --> 01:06:22,090
Don't let the bed bug bite.

1056
01:06:30,270 --> 01:06:31,270
Hey.

1057
01:06:32,330 --> 01:06:36,170
Hey. I was just going over some stuff
for tomorrow.

1058
01:06:36,790 --> 01:06:37,790
Yeah, cool.

1059
01:06:40,050 --> 01:06:41,050
I'm serious.

1060
01:06:41,650 --> 01:06:42,650
Okay.

1061
01:06:48,950 --> 01:06:50,390
forgot to restock my minibar.

1062
01:06:51,190 --> 01:06:52,190
How's yours looking?

1063
01:06:53,050 --> 01:06:55,730
You know, I'm super tired. I'm just
going to head to the site.

1064
01:06:56,810 --> 01:06:57,810
Oh.

1065
01:06:58,210 --> 01:06:59,210
I'll see you tomorrow, then.

1066
01:06:59,850 --> 01:07:00,850
Good night.

1067
01:07:04,010 --> 01:07:05,010
And 17!

1068
01:07:05,810 --> 01:07:06,810
Oh!

1069
01:07:07,710 --> 01:07:08,710
All done!

1070
01:07:09,870 --> 01:07:10,870
Shelly!

1071
01:07:11,670 --> 01:07:13,810
Ooh, Shelly, someone's got a mess.

1072
01:07:25,830 --> 01:07:26,930
Oh, no.

1073
01:07:27,410 --> 01:07:33,970
I had many jobs when I lived here in New
Salem. My favorite job was

1074
01:07:33,970 --> 01:07:38,570
splitting rails, which is why they
called me Rail Splitter.

1075
01:07:40,830 --> 01:07:44,090
Anybody know any of my other nicknames?

1076
01:07:45,110 --> 01:07:46,110
Honest Abe.

1077
01:07:46,390 --> 01:07:49,230
Yes, obviously, Honest Abe.

1078
01:07:49,490 --> 01:07:54,230
That was the big one, Honest Abe. They
always called me that because I said

1079
01:07:54,230 --> 01:07:55,230
was on my mind.

1080
01:07:55,480 --> 01:07:57,100
Even if it made me unpopular.

1081
01:07:58,220 --> 01:08:03,880
Remember, a great man always has the
courage to say what is in his heart.

1082
01:08:05,340 --> 01:08:06,340
Yeah?

1083
01:08:09,160 --> 01:08:11,320
I love Chase Rubin Rossi.

1084
01:08:13,520 --> 01:08:14,520
Great.

1085
01:08:15,300 --> 01:08:18,240
Who would like to see Mary Todd churn
butter? Churn butter.

1086
01:08:18,479 --> 01:08:19,479
I love you, Chase.

1087
01:08:19,560 --> 01:08:21,500
I want to yell it from the mountaintops.

1088
01:08:22,250 --> 01:08:26,670
and even though you pretty much stopped
talking to me in fifth grade i don't

1089
01:08:26,670 --> 01:08:32,350
care i remember the chase that wrote me
a card when my dad was overweight and

1090
01:08:32,350 --> 01:08:36,850
had to go to the hospital because of his
heart and a year later when he left my

1091
01:08:36,850 --> 01:08:41,529
mom and moved in with his trainer you
wrote me another card what happened to

1092
01:08:41,529 --> 01:08:47,050
remember in the second grade when we had
a sleepover and you wet the bed and you

1093
01:08:47,050 --> 01:08:52,620
were so embarrassed and you made me
promise never to tell anyone well I

1094
01:08:52,620 --> 01:08:54,120
have, and I never will.

1095
01:08:55,220 --> 01:08:56,340
So there it is.

1096
01:08:57,100 --> 01:08:58,399
My heart on a sleeve.

1097
01:08:59,560 --> 01:09:00,680
Don't let me leave.

1098
01:09:00,920 --> 01:09:01,920
Oh, please don't.

1099
01:09:02,180 --> 01:09:03,180
Always.

1100
01:09:03,520 --> 01:09:04,520
Believe.

1101
01:09:06,580 --> 01:09:13,439
All right, guys, come

1102
01:09:13,439 --> 01:09:14,439
on, settle down.

1103
01:09:14,600 --> 01:09:17,500
Okay, let's see how Mary Todd's doing
with that butter.

1104
01:09:18,300 --> 01:09:20,920
Okay. That's enough. We get it. You're
crying.

1105
01:09:21,220 --> 01:09:23,420
You just laughed at me. You called me
gross.

1106
01:09:23,720 --> 01:09:25,000
Yeah, did you hear your speech?

1107
01:09:25,740 --> 01:09:26,740
Come on, let's go back.

1108
01:09:26,939 --> 01:09:30,080
No. No, I'm not going back. Come on.
Just leave me alone.

1109
01:09:48,390 --> 01:09:49,390
We done running?

1110
01:09:50,069 --> 01:09:51,330
Uh, everything okay in here?

1111
01:09:52,130 --> 01:09:53,130
It's okay.

1112
01:09:53,330 --> 01:09:54,330
I'm his teacher.

1113
01:09:54,510 --> 01:09:56,030
Oh, okay. Take your time.

1114
01:09:57,550 --> 01:09:59,250
She's never gonna like me, is she?

1115
01:09:59,510 --> 01:10:01,830
We can go on this? She's my everything.

1116
01:10:03,750 --> 01:10:07,250
Okay, here's the deal, man. I cannot
keep sugarcoating this for you.

1117
01:10:07,530 --> 01:10:10,830
This girl is never gonna be interested
in you.

1118
01:10:11,250 --> 01:10:17,170
Never. You clearly have a rich interior
life with the poems and the whatever,

1119
01:10:17,330 --> 01:10:20,520
but... She wants a guy like Ian, what's
his face?

1120
01:10:20,820 --> 01:10:22,380
Ian Mendelbaum, the rapper?

1121
01:10:23,060 --> 01:10:24,060
He's an idiot.

1122
01:10:24,280 --> 01:10:27,000
Yeah, he's a fucking moron. But she
doesn't care.

1123
01:10:27,260 --> 01:10:29,840
She's superficial and her priorities are
all fucked up.

1124
01:10:32,560 --> 01:10:38,000
She likes him because he's hot and
popular, dude. You are sensitive.

1125
01:10:38,600 --> 01:10:41,160
Yes, thank you. It's not a compliment.

1126
01:10:42,220 --> 01:10:44,660
You have some rough road ahead of you.

1127
01:10:45,180 --> 01:10:46,660
Seventh grade is not your moment.

1128
01:10:47,040 --> 01:10:50,120
Yeah. Eighth grade will be better.
Probably not.

1129
01:10:50,420 --> 01:10:51,420
Think in college.

1130
01:10:51,960 --> 01:10:52,960
That's your window.

1131
01:10:53,860 --> 01:10:54,860
Be ready.

1132
01:10:58,200 --> 01:11:01,420
I don't know. If I go back out there,
everyone's going to laugh at me.

1133
01:11:10,060 --> 01:11:11,220
Maybe this will help.

1134
01:11:11,480 --> 01:11:12,480
What are you doing?

1135
01:11:12,520 --> 01:11:13,660
I'm giving you a gift.

1136
01:11:15,200 --> 01:11:16,720
Whoa. We?

1137
01:11:17,770 --> 01:11:19,150
are going to change the news cycle.

1138
01:11:20,950 --> 01:11:21,950
Trust me on that.

1139
01:11:25,190 --> 01:11:26,530
I thought it would be heavier.

1140
01:11:27,010 --> 01:11:28,010
Don't be weird.

1141
01:11:28,190 --> 01:11:30,710
And take this off. Never fucking wear it
again. What, are you crazy?

1142
01:11:36,210 --> 01:11:37,370
Everything okay with Garrett?

1143
01:11:37,850 --> 01:11:38,850
No, it's not.

1144
01:11:39,490 --> 01:11:42,670
I found him hooking up with an eighth
grader from another school. She was

1145
01:11:42,670 --> 01:11:43,670
jerking him off.

1146
01:11:44,270 --> 01:11:46,490
Yeah, I'm going to give him detention
when we get back.

1147
01:11:47,150 --> 01:11:48,790
That's probably a good idea. Yeah.

1148
01:11:49,530 --> 01:11:51,590
Garrett probably met up with a kid from
an all -boys school.

1149
01:11:52,050 --> 01:11:53,970
Yeah, and he was wearing this.

1150
01:11:54,990 --> 01:11:55,990
What?

1151
01:11:56,930 --> 01:11:57,930
Awesome.

1152
01:11:58,170 --> 01:11:59,170
It's real.

1153
01:12:02,710 --> 01:12:03,710
It's a nice thing you did.

1154
01:12:05,390 --> 01:12:06,670
I know what you're talking about.

1155
01:12:06,930 --> 01:12:10,330
Really? Because I couldn't help but
notice that you're not wearing a bra.

1156
01:12:11,950 --> 01:12:14,030
And those kids over there are playing
with one.

1157
01:12:16,170 --> 01:12:17,350
Lots of people don't wear bras.

1158
01:12:17,670 --> 01:12:19,510
Definitely. A lot of teachers.

1159
01:12:20,710 --> 01:12:23,270
Well, if you must know, I was helping a
student through a tough time.

1160
01:12:23,970 --> 01:12:25,730
I'm going through such a tough time.

1161
01:12:26,590 --> 01:12:27,590
Can I have your panties?

1162
01:12:28,170 --> 01:12:29,250
I'm not wearing any.

1163
01:12:39,410 --> 01:12:42,150
Amy, what are you doing here? Stop. Talk
to the hand.

1164
01:12:43,550 --> 01:12:44,850
Amy. I know.

1165
01:12:46,659 --> 01:12:48,060
Whatever we think.

1166
01:12:48,640 --> 01:12:54,480
Carl Halabi, the state test, the blatant
disregard for the school syllabus, and

1167
01:12:54,480 --> 01:12:56,900
let's not forget sleeping with my
boyfriend.

1168
01:12:58,780 --> 01:13:01,040
Got your phone accidentally called me
last night.

1169
01:13:02,200 --> 01:13:05,280
I can't believe you'd let her take
advantage of you like that.

1170
01:13:06,180 --> 01:13:08,680
You are too trusting.

1171
01:13:09,160 --> 01:13:10,160
I am.

1172
01:13:10,400 --> 01:13:11,900
I didn't know what was happening.

1173
01:13:12,430 --> 01:13:14,890
I hope you haven't spent that bonus
check or anything because you're about

1174
01:13:14,890 --> 01:13:16,290
give it back. And then some.

1175
01:13:17,350 --> 01:13:18,350
Jail time.

1176
01:13:19,170 --> 01:13:20,170
Jail time.

1177
01:13:20,950 --> 01:13:23,370
Did you ever think that maybe... Save
it, doll face.

1178
01:13:23,770 --> 01:13:27,570
You can explain it all tomorrow to the
principal and the superintendent.

1179
01:13:28,190 --> 01:13:31,030
When you got your meeting with the
principal and the superintendent

1180
01:13:31,290 --> 01:13:32,310
At the meeting.

1181
01:13:33,990 --> 01:13:34,990
Tomorrow.

1182
01:13:44,560 --> 01:13:47,280
I need you to go to this guy's office
and scare the shit out of him.

1183
01:13:48,580 --> 01:13:49,740
Tell me my mission again.

1184
01:13:50,940 --> 01:13:51,940
Hand him the envelope.

1185
01:13:52,560 --> 01:13:54,120
I'm going to need a couple bucks for
gas.

1186
01:13:58,680 --> 01:14:00,140
And a couple bucks for snacks.

1187
01:14:14,910 --> 01:14:16,950
When the darkness falls.

1188
01:14:18,270 --> 01:14:20,890
When you least expect me.

1189
01:14:21,650 --> 01:14:25,250
And you turn your... Oh, my God!

1190
01:14:26,470 --> 01:14:29,030
Sir? Oh, my God, are you okay?

1191
01:14:29,290 --> 01:14:33,030
I think I fucked up my knee. Okay, easy.
Easy does it. Easy.

1192
01:14:33,730 --> 01:14:36,090
Easy. Do you need an ambulance?

1193
01:14:36,350 --> 01:14:37,450
Ambulance is not necessary.

1194
01:14:37,790 --> 01:14:41,050
Just walk it up. Okay, walking up.
Number one worst thing you should

1195
01:14:41,050 --> 01:14:42,050
do.

1196
01:14:43,900 --> 01:14:44,900
Please don't touch my mirror.

1197
01:14:45,600 --> 01:14:47,300
What the fuck?

1198
01:14:47,540 --> 01:14:48,840
What the fuck? Who does that?

1199
01:14:49,120 --> 01:14:50,200
I'm a friend of Marjorie's.

1200
01:14:50,480 --> 01:14:54,520
Oh, a friend of Marjorie's? Well, get in
there. Fuck you, man.

1201
01:14:54,780 --> 01:14:59,680
Fuck you. Fuck you. Fuck you. You like
that? Stop kicking it. You stop fucking

1202
01:14:59,680 --> 01:15:03,240
kicking it. Fuck your scooter and fuck
Marjorie's. She drugged me and she stole

1203
01:15:03,240 --> 01:15:04,800
from me and she's going down. Let me
think.

1204
01:15:15,470 --> 01:15:16,470
Open them.

1205
01:15:18,590 --> 01:15:19,590
Yeah, not bad.

1206
01:15:19,690 --> 01:15:20,850
For a camera phone, huh?

1207
01:15:21,990 --> 01:15:23,230
You can keep those, too.

1208
01:15:23,450 --> 01:15:24,450
Fuck.

1209
01:15:25,210 --> 01:15:26,270
And I was never here.

1210
01:15:26,750 --> 01:15:27,750
You hear me?

1211
01:15:27,930 --> 01:15:28,930
Fuck.

1212
01:15:31,250 --> 01:15:32,870
Don't stop fucking with my car!

1213
01:15:38,110 --> 01:15:39,110
They're ready for you.

1214
01:15:42,450 --> 01:15:44,190
Learning is fun tactic.

1215
01:15:45,680 --> 01:15:47,580
What'd you say to me? Your desk?

1216
01:15:51,760 --> 01:15:53,920
Yeah. I forgot that was there.

1217
01:15:54,760 --> 01:15:56,140
I'm such a ditz sometimes.

1218
01:15:58,400 --> 01:16:02,080
This is very, very bad, Elizabeth.

1219
01:16:02,540 --> 01:16:04,740
Incredibly very bad, Elizabeth.

1220
01:16:05,000 --> 01:16:06,720
Bring him in.

1221
01:16:17,480 --> 01:16:20,360
Mr. Halabi, thank you for your time.
You're most welcome.

1222
01:16:20,940 --> 01:16:27,280
I guess I should begin by saying that my
statement from earlier in the week was

1223
01:16:27,280 --> 01:16:28,280
not true.

1224
01:16:29,400 --> 01:16:30,900
What part of it, exactly?

1225
01:16:32,280 --> 01:16:33,280
All of it.

1226
01:16:33,940 --> 01:16:34,940
Pretty much.

1227
01:16:35,500 --> 01:16:37,400
I've never seen this woman before in my
life.

1228
01:16:38,060 --> 01:16:41,940
Baloney! You seemed very certain a
couple of days ago.

1229
01:16:42,500 --> 01:16:44,140
I did, because...

1230
01:16:48,720 --> 01:16:50,020
I am a casual drug user.

1231
01:16:50,440 --> 01:16:56,440
That's my thing, and everybody knows it.
So, that explains me making

1232
01:16:56,440 --> 01:16:58,080
absolutely no sense.

1233
01:17:01,060 --> 01:17:02,060
Thank you.

1234
01:17:02,720 --> 01:17:06,460
You realize that if we find out you're
lying, you're gonna lose your job.

1235
01:17:06,820 --> 01:17:08,000
Plus jail time.

1236
01:17:08,400 --> 01:17:09,400
Yes, I understand.

1237
01:17:10,020 --> 01:17:14,480
I just don't want to see an innocent
teacher get hurt.

1238
01:17:15,340 --> 01:17:17,740
Thank you, sir. I don't want to see...

1239
01:17:18,010 --> 01:17:20,070
Anybody get hurt?

1240
01:17:29,090 --> 01:17:30,210
What the hell was that?

1241
01:17:30,970 --> 01:17:32,010
So, there you go.

1242
01:17:32,410 --> 01:17:33,790
I guess that explains everything.

1243
01:17:34,190 --> 01:17:35,190
Re -test.

1244
01:17:35,430 --> 01:17:37,930
Re -test. Re -test. Dammit, squirrel!

1245
01:17:38,410 --> 01:17:40,270
I am not going to have a repeat of 2008.

1246
01:17:40,750 --> 01:17:41,750
Stick your ass out.

1247
01:17:44,690 --> 01:17:45,770
A re -test on.

1248
01:17:46,350 --> 01:17:49,490
Come on, do we really want to tell our
young people that if they study,

1249
01:17:49,570 --> 01:17:53,610
sacrifice, and achieve the highest
scores in the state, that they're

1250
01:17:53,610 --> 01:17:54,690
with suspicion?

1251
01:17:55,930 --> 01:17:57,670
I don't.

1252
01:17:58,930 --> 01:18:01,390
I find these kinds of accusations
troubling.

1253
01:18:01,890 --> 01:18:04,650
And quite frankly, reckless.

1254
01:18:05,710 --> 01:18:09,210
I work my ass off for this school, and I
know I am not perfect.

1255
01:18:10,190 --> 01:18:11,890
But show me the perfect teacher.

1256
01:18:12,290 --> 01:18:13,290
You can't.

1257
01:18:14,060 --> 01:18:18,620
There are even teachers in this very
school who use drugs.

1258
01:18:19,220 --> 01:18:21,920
They do. They do use drugs. They do.

1259
01:18:22,180 --> 01:18:23,019
They do.

1260
01:18:23,020 --> 01:18:24,020
They do.

1261
01:18:24,540 --> 01:18:28,700
Wally, do you remember how I told you
there are teachers here who use and

1262
01:18:28,700 --> 01:18:31,220
drugs? God damn it.

1263
01:18:31,520 --> 01:18:32,900
And I'm hearing about this now?

1264
01:18:37,000 --> 01:18:39,900
Where is it, Axel? Where is it, boy?

1265
01:18:40,140 --> 01:18:41,420
No, no, no. That's my class.

1266
01:18:41,700 --> 01:18:43,220
Axel's barking up the wrong tree there.

1267
01:18:43,720 --> 01:18:47,500
Ma 'am, please don't touch the dog. Your
dog has been taken.

1268
01:18:49,360 --> 01:18:50,360
You got it.

1269
01:18:50,720 --> 01:18:52,500
He's not going to find anything in here.

1270
01:18:58,520 --> 01:18:59,419
It's clean.

1271
01:18:59,420 --> 01:19:00,420
Ha!

1272
01:19:00,680 --> 01:19:01,680
I told you.

1273
01:19:01,940 --> 01:19:03,520
Maybe there's a false bottom.

1274
01:19:15,690 --> 01:19:16,690
That is not mine.

1275
01:19:16,970 --> 01:19:20,350
This isn't even my desk. It's hers.

1276
01:19:20,650 --> 01:19:21,650
Don't worry, Amy.

1277
01:19:21,770 --> 01:19:23,270
We'll get you the help you need.

1278
01:19:26,070 --> 01:19:27,410
You monster!

1279
01:19:27,770 --> 01:19:28,770
Whoa! Amy!

1280
01:19:29,150 --> 01:19:30,830
Calm down, Amy.

1281
01:19:31,130 --> 01:19:33,470
God fucking damn it! What the fuck?

1282
01:19:33,690 --> 01:19:35,430
I stole her desk!

1283
01:19:35,770 --> 01:19:37,510
You can check my urine!

1284
01:19:37,810 --> 01:19:38,810
Check it!

1285
01:19:38,990 --> 01:19:40,510
Check my urine!

1286
01:19:41,490 --> 01:19:44,570
Well, it's been another great year here
at Jam's.

1287
01:19:45,519 --> 01:19:48,600
With summer around the corner, it's time
to say goodbye not only to another

1288
01:19:48,600 --> 01:19:50,800
school year, but also to one of our own.

1289
01:19:52,460 --> 01:19:53,680
Amy Squirrel.

1290
01:19:54,020 --> 01:19:58,780
After six short years, Amy is
transferring out of the district.

1291
01:19:59,120 --> 01:20:00,120
Speech! Speech!

1292
01:20:00,260 --> 01:20:06,180
Well... Wally, thank you for those kind
words, and thank you all.

1293
01:20:06,620 --> 01:20:11,560
My decision that I made myself to leave
was super difficult, but...

1294
01:20:11,790 --> 01:20:15,530
When the superintendent personally asks
you to work at one of the worst schools

1295
01:20:15,530 --> 01:20:19,330
in the state, well, you say yes.

1296
01:20:20,310 --> 01:20:25,790
Boy, I am looking forward to bringing my
brand of zany energy to those

1297
01:20:25,790 --> 01:20:28,570
underprivileged students at Malcolm X
High School.

1298
01:20:30,650 --> 01:20:31,650
Thank you.

1299
01:20:32,850 --> 01:20:39,730
Hey, Elizabeth. Listen, since Amy's
transferring, maybe the two of us

1300
01:20:39,730 --> 01:20:40,730
can start over.

1301
01:20:45,160 --> 01:20:46,160
Oh, hey there.

1302
01:20:46,340 --> 01:20:47,620
Scott Delacorte. And you are?

1303
01:20:48,880 --> 01:20:49,880
Leaving.

1304
01:21:06,280 --> 01:21:07,280
Elizabeth.

1305
01:21:08,560 --> 01:21:09,560
Here.

1306
01:21:11,380 --> 01:21:12,380
Buy me your book.

1307
01:21:12,720 --> 01:21:13,720
Hold my balls back.

1308
01:21:16,330 --> 01:21:20,830
I'm going to write my number down in
case you need a lift after the surgery.

1309
01:21:21,270 --> 01:21:24,130
Just like an extra set of hands to make
sure the implants are settling properly.

1310
01:21:24,730 --> 01:21:25,730
Thanks.

1311
01:21:26,070 --> 01:21:30,250
Hey, you're not going to teach again
next year, are you? I don't know.

1312
01:21:30,470 --> 01:21:31,690
It's the only thing I'm good at.

1313
01:21:31,910 --> 01:21:35,930
I'm just saying maybe you should
consider doing something else, like

1314
01:21:35,930 --> 01:21:38,850
else, like any other job in the entire
world.

1315
01:21:41,730 --> 01:21:44,650
You know, the two of us?

1316
01:21:45,740 --> 01:21:46,740
It's never going to happen.

1317
01:21:47,700 --> 01:21:49,880
Clearly. I mean, how would that even
work?

1318
01:21:50,400 --> 01:21:54,540
Where do you even live? In some weird
apartment with some creepy roommate?

1319
01:21:54,880 --> 01:21:58,660
No, my creepy roommate moved out, so now
it's just me and the dogs.

1320
01:21:59,120 --> 01:22:00,380
How many dogs do you have?

1321
01:22:00,680 --> 01:22:02,160
Four. Four dogs? Yeah.

1322
01:22:02,380 --> 01:22:03,380
Four Dobermans.

1323
01:22:03,960 --> 01:22:04,960
Any family money?

1324
01:22:05,140 --> 01:22:06,180
Yeah, you bet.

1325
01:22:06,400 --> 01:22:08,660
We're talking like three figures.

1326
01:22:09,460 --> 01:22:10,540
Almost 700 bucks.

1327
01:22:11,920 --> 01:22:14,900
So basically, if I was going to go out
with you, I would be making the

1328
01:22:14,900 --> 01:22:18,500
choice to be dating a gym teacher who
lives in a shack with four dogs.

1329
01:22:19,060 --> 01:22:24,800
I prefer to think of it as two people
with amazing bodies sharing those bodies

1330
01:22:24,800 --> 01:22:28,720
with each other, giving each other the
gift of these bodies.

1331
01:22:29,840 --> 01:22:30,840
Anyway,

1332
01:22:31,380 --> 01:22:32,820
actually, none of this really matters.

1333
01:22:33,740 --> 01:22:35,900
I sort of started seeing somebody.

1334
01:22:37,540 --> 01:22:38,540
Oh.

1335
01:22:40,460 --> 01:22:41,460
Really?

1336
01:22:41,600 --> 01:22:43,760
Congratulations. I didn't realize that.

1337
01:22:44,540 --> 01:22:45,540
Yeah.

1338
01:22:45,800 --> 01:22:46,800
So stupid.

1339
01:22:47,640 --> 01:22:48,740
I'm just fucking with you.

1340
01:22:51,220 --> 01:22:52,520
Guess I deserve that one.

1341
01:22:52,840 --> 01:22:56,860
Yeah, you most certainly do. I think
it's about time you realize that the

1342
01:22:56,860 --> 01:22:57,460
world...

1343
01:22:57,460 --> 01:23:06,840
Be

1344
01:23:06,840 --> 01:23:07,840
around, Jim Teacher.

1345
01:23:19,880 --> 01:23:20,880
Let's do that again.

1346
01:23:40,120 --> 01:23:41,240
Hey, Elizabeth.

1347
01:23:41,540 --> 01:23:43,340
Hey, Lynn. How was your summer?

1348
01:23:43,700 --> 01:23:47,780
Oh, it was great. I went to the zoo
almost every weekend. Wow, that sounds

1349
01:23:47,780 --> 01:23:48,780
great.

1350
01:23:49,100 --> 01:23:51,740
Oh, you didn't get your tits.

1351
01:23:52,020 --> 01:23:54,640
Yeah, I thought about it, you know.
Because I don't even need them.

1352
01:23:55,380 --> 01:23:57,200
Plus, they're really expensive, you
know, per tit.

1353
01:23:57,520 --> 01:23:59,240
Yeah, and you've got to get two of them.

1354
01:24:02,140 --> 01:24:03,180
And I met a guy.

1355
01:24:03,580 --> 01:24:04,660
Well, tell me everything.

1356
01:24:04,900 --> 01:24:06,520
Did you find your Prince Charming?

1357
01:24:09,020 --> 01:24:10,020
Something like that.

1358
01:24:12,280 --> 01:24:13,620
Hey, you want to grab lunch later?

1359
01:24:13,880 --> 01:24:15,540
Oh, sure. Yeah, my treat.

1360
01:24:15,920 --> 01:24:18,920
Oh, you got it last time. We'll split
it. Oh, okay.

1361
01:24:19,140 --> 01:24:20,140
Yeah.

1362
01:24:23,340 --> 01:24:25,060
Hey, you and the cape.

1363
01:24:25,720 --> 01:24:26,720
You're up first. Let's go.

1364
01:24:45,990 --> 01:24:46,990
Thank you.